Just a waste!

8

Hanni kept looking at Minji, something wasn't right. She knew she did the worst by leaving Minji that night at the party the way she did. And she regret it so much.

But she never expected it to shut Minji off completely. Minji actually avoided her in the hallways as if she was the plague, and made sure to switch seats with someone else in class just so that they wouldn't sit next to each other at all.

Minji didn't even bat a single eye at her and that was worrying enough. Even Haerin doesn't seem to be able to bring Minji's mood back up and Hanni is just genuinely confused. She wanted to understand but her small brain didn't let her, or maybe deep down she didn't want to because she knew her heart would give in.

Minji, apart from all the teasing and headaches that she's given Hanni. Was always kind to her, in some sort of way that Hanni couldn't deny.

Hanni sat on the bleachers, eyes not daring to look away from Minji who just sat there lifeless at the other end of the gym. There were a bunch of girls around her trying to get her attention. But Minji didn't seem to care.

She isn't flirting back, or even trying to talk to them. Which was the worst part about it. Minji would've been all over them to spite Hanni by now. Or even winking at her to anger her.

"You should go talk to her." Danielle's voice snapped her out of her thoughts. "There's no point, I left a lot of things clear." Hanni said and Danielle let out a sigh. "You're being unfair, Hanni. Look at her, she gave in to what you wanted too. You can't just blame her for everything." Danielle said and Hanni let out a sigh of her own.

"Look at her, Hanni. You hurt her feelings. Minji isn't a bad person, you know that. Maybe she didn't want anything like that to happen too. But she's only human, and she's able to give in even if she doesn't want to." Danielle was trying to convince Hanni to go apologize to Minji for leaving her like that.

But Hanni was stubborn.

Very stubborn so Danielle had to take matters into her own hands. "I will not sit here and watch you two yearn for each other from afar." And before Hanni could ask Danielle about what the hell she was talking about.

Danielle had already started to drag her towards Minji. And as soon as Hanni realized this, she started to protest and Hanni didn't seem to understand from where the hell Danielle got such sudden strength from.

"Danielle, you better let me go!" Hanni threatened and the taller Aussie rolled her eyes. "No! Because what the actual fuck, Hanni. You promised to never hurt her like that, did you forget that?" And Hanni froze.

Danielle turned around to look at a frozen Hanni with a sigh. "Minji was good to you, Hanni. You broke up with her for some stupid reason. Now, go over there and apologize. Tell her that it was your fault too and that you fucking want her back." And with that. Hanni was shoved harshly towards Minji.

Hanni furrowed her eyebrows at what Danielle had said. Hanni doesn't want Minji back, well that's what she tells herself all the time. Basically anytime that Minji is near her and messing with her, her heart doing a slight leap each time.

Minji whose attention was caught, looked up at Hanni but that bright glint wasn't there and that scared Hanni so suddenly. "If you want to talk about what happened, don't worry. I forgot  about it." Minji said as she stood up, getting ready to walk away from Hanni.

But Hanni stopped her by wrapping her fingers around Minji's wrist. "Can we talk, please?" Minji looked at Hanni with soft eyes. "Okay." Was all Minji said and Hanni let out a relieved sigh as she carefully tugged on Minji's wrist to guide her.

They reached a place behind the bleachers and Hanni could only look away from Minji. "I just wanted to say that I'm sorry, about leaving you the way I did." Hanni said finally having the courage to look at Minji. "It was all just coming down on me. It shouldn't have happened but I can't even blame you. I was acting so out of place as well and I just—at the moment I didn't want to think I was at fault too, I knew I was but I wanted to blame you." Hanni said, bracing herself for Minji to tell her to fuck off.

But instead, a pair of arms were wrapping around her. "It's okay, we let our emotions get the best of us. And I wasn't even mad at you. I just thought that you'd want me to not talk to you at all anymore." Typical Hanni would've pulled away and shoved Minji back for hugging her.

But rational Hanni told her to hold Minji. And that's exactly what she did.

She wrapped her arms around Minji and let Minji's warmth embrace her like it used to do. And maybe this is what Hanni ran away from all the time. Deep inside, Hanni knew she craved the warmth Minji once gave her.

"I was scared, Minji." Hanni mumbled. "You shouldn't be, Hanni. It's just me." Minji said but Hanni shook her head. "It's because it's you, I was scared that it would change everything. I don't want—I don't want to give you any false hope." Hanni felt Minji's embrace loosen a bit.

And she wished she could rewind that moment and instead of that say "I want you back, I want a second try." Like Danielle had told her to say. But Hanni just wasted it.

"Don't worry about that, you've left it pretty clear. There's no second try for us." Minji said and Hanni felt her heart sink. "And maybe it's truly time for me to do what I should've done." Hanni pulled away confused.

"In some deep part of my heart, I didn't want to let you go. So teasing you and bothering you kept me in your life. Even if it made you hate me even more." Hanni stood there looking up at Minji frozen, sensing what Minji was about to tell her.

"I know that I should probably regret what happened between us that night, but I don't. If anything it brings me closure. I had you in my arms for one last time, and that's all I ever wanted." Hanni felt her eyes tearing up.

Fuck Minji for being so well spoken, fuck Minji for being so sweet and just the best woman alive, and fuck Minji for being the love of her life. Because now it's truly hurting.

"But I think it's time for me to let you go...my love." And Hanni's heart and world halted in place. Her heart was suddenly so heavy inside her chest. Hanni was shaking her head, this isn't about to happen.

"I promised that I'd leave you alone, and I did everything but that, so I guess it's time for me to actually keep that promise." Minji leaned in and placed a gentle kiss on Hanni's temple.

A tear fell from the corner of Hanni's eye.

And with that Minji pulled away and looked at Hanni with a soft smile as she wiped that same tear away. "Goodbye, Hanni." And suddenly her name became the one thing she hated the most.

Her world was crumbling down as she watched Minji step away. And Hanni caught a small glimpse of the tear that fell from Minji's own eye and she wanted to chase after her once Minji started to walk away.

But she was frozen.

Hanni watched as Minji ignored the world and basically started to run out the gym without looking back and Hanni's heart shattered into a million pieces.

And that's when she realized it all. She had never let go of Minji to begin with.

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