Letters I wrote you

Thirty-nine

We  went sailing today. At the beginning it was all five of us in Tim's sail boat, but little by little our numbers went down.

Nora and Shaun where the first to leave. On the contrary to his younger brother, Shaun didn't look to fond of the sea. Nora wasn't either,she was more of a land person. So after a mere half hour of sailing, off they went.

Shaun got her an Ice cream, at a local parlor, they talked for ages walking through the little town. They came home as late as me and Tim, which meant after the sun set. Of course the only way I know all this is because Nora told me so.

Lori went off later around two hours into It, she had to go join some friends.

Which left me and Tim alone.

We sailed for a little while, then once the wind had gone down completely we anchored the boat to a complete stop. The sea was beautiful, all this vast plains of water that stretched infinitely.There at the limit of that infinity I could just make out the line where the sky's touched the seas. The line of possibilities, where dreams came true. That line that sailors chased for centuries, giving everything they had to reach it. They always found land and abandoned their search, or simply forgot it. Magical places like these are after all not made for the human body, It was missing wings. But the mind has wings of its own. All it needs is a little imagination then all is possible. That line after all was not made for the body but for the soul.

My eyes had been so distracted by those thoughts, by that want to reach the sky's with not only my brain but my body, that I hadn't realized Tim had sat down next to me, his feet also dangling from the side of the boat. I was only when he started speaking that I took notice of his presence next to me.

"It was my grandfather that taught me to sail, he used to take me sailing every Sunday. We'd spend the day on his boat never going to far but not staying to close either. We even went on a trip once, just the two of us, a few days to reach somewhere new. He loved sailing so much he passed that passion to me. I regret having stopped for so long."

He continued his monologue, telling me more about his grandfather. I could see in the way that he talked about him that he loved him very much and admired him. He told me everything or at least almost. From his childhood, through his teenage years, his relationship with his siblings, his friends, the death of his grandfather that had left a big mark on him, his entry in the military school, his joining of the army. I had to resist the urge of asking him whether he had ever heard of You. But I didn't dare interrupt him to scared he'd stop.

He didn't detail much the reason for his leaving the army neither the reason he stayed in our small city but that didn't matter to me. I know so much more about him now.

We stayed on the boat so long we even got to see the sunset, It was beautiful watching the sun go down and being swallowed by the ocean.The sky was filled with colors brighter then a rainbow. The only clouds we could see where as pink as cotton-candy and looked as fluffy too. I just felt as if I could raise my hands, catch one and take a big bite of its fluffiness. The way it would just melt on my tongue and vanish I could only imagine. I haven't eaten one in ages,since you where here actually...

Remember that funfair, the one you took me to on one of our first dates, we where still very young then, not that I'm much older now but still it feels like centuries ago... That had been the best funfair I had ever been to. Those bumper cars, you just couldn't get enough, like a kid you wanted to go on and on again. We had done so many activities that night, between the Ferris wheel, the hall of mirrors and all the other things we had done, the night had gone by fast, you had bought me my first and last cotton-candy. You wanted to surprise me and that you had, I had never tasted something quite like it. We had walked in the park till morning came, the sunrise as beautiful as ever, we had seen it from the hill you had made me climb just for the occasion. It had been a perfect date, one of the best ones and now one of the best memories I had of you. I miss you so badly, but for the first time in a while I've been able to bring up a nice memory without feeling that sad and bitter feeling, I just smiled to the memory like an old friend.

I love you Jared I really do, but I think I'm starting to love Tim too. And even if this seems wired or sometimes even wrong I think you would want me to move on and be happy, to not stay stuck on you forever.

So know that you will always be in my heart.

The sun just rose, a new day will begin soon when the others wake, I wonder how it'll go. Tim looked a little hesitant, just a little,about something yesterday evening but I didn't want to ruin thing by asking what it was, maybe I'll get to know today.

-Jane

_______________________

Same word problem again, I just can't seem to solve it  :/ sorry