I looked at Rip and he looked at me
"What?" he asked
"if you wanted to see titties and half-dressed woman you could've asked me," I say
"I was there to recruit Avery. not for the show" he says
"Oh, so you didn't watch two flat-chesteded women move like they are stiff as boards?" I asked
He sighed
" I don't need this shit from you woman," he says getting up and coming closer grabbing my face and tilting it up having me look right into his eyes.
"Yeah, there were dancers seeing as it's a strip bar. But I wasn't getting any reaction from them and when one approached me I told her to get lost before I saw Avery. Then I walked off and started talking to her. These dancers can't nor will they ever do anything for me. You are the only one I get off on seeing nude half-dressed. " he says
"I just fucking hate that you went there and watched them. It doesn't help self-esteem that has been shitty and low for a long while now" I say
"Why?" he asked
I shrugged my shoulders not able to answer that.
"talk to me. what has been occurring?" he asked
"do you have time?" I asked
"I do," he says
"I've been experiencing so much body changing it's not even funny. and I don't want to be getting my hopes up thinking it's one thing and it be something different" I say
"Meaning?" he asked
"I think I'm pregnant Rip" I tell him
he lets my face go and steps back.
" if you are?" he asked
I stood up and I got in his face.
"if I am I'm keeping them just as I had Cal. & and you don't want to be a father to our blood then say it now don't wait till its to late." I say
"meaning what?" he asked
"you and I have a brand of our own just like you have for this ranch. you want to end things due to me possibly carrying your child then I'll remove the brand we have, divorce you, and you can go about your marry way being the foreman here while I go about mine being a mother of two" I say
He looks at me not saying a word.
"well what is it gonna be?" I asked
"I don't want to be like my stepfather" he says
"you was al lot happy and willing to be in Cal's life and your his stepfather. but now that I'm possibly carrying our baby fear is taking over and you wanna back down. that makes no sense to me Rip" I say
"It makes a lot of sense seeing as that baby you're possibly caring is my blood. a part of me" he says
"and Cal isn't... I know that damn it. but I know that you love Cal as if he were yours, you had since first meeting him." I say as I kept looking at him
when he says nothing I continue talking.
" so tell the truth what's got you terrified of being a father to our blood?" I asked
"I'm scared that's the damn truth. I'm scared that our baby if there is one is gonna be fucked up like me" he says
"your not fucked up" I say
"no?" he asked
"No... you had a fucked up way of growing up before John found you but other than that. you are a beautiful person, you are a loving, devoted, thoughtful person. you give a shit about people, you do what you can to help, you love your stepson so much, and you teach him things I cant cause I am clueless as hell to half the things that you know. you're fucking smart, you're the fucking love of my life who I am so fucking thankful that we crossed paths and been going strong for years." I say getting teary eyed while he doesn't say a word just clenches his jaw and
"But I will not force you to face this fear or be a part of our baby's life if I am carrying one." I say before I try to blink the tears away but the fall anyways.
we stand there not speaking.
"I'm gonna head. Hopefully I'll be back before Cal gets home from school" I say before I grab my belongs and head for the door.
when Rip grabs my hand and pulls me back to him wipes the tears from my face and kisses me.
"we'll go and find and and we'll be in their lives together. I will not abandon them, nor will I let you go. you and I have lived through hell and we've not let anything or anyone break us apart or ruin things between us. and I'm not about to be the asshole to fuck this up between us. I had never worn protection with you and I know your birthcontrol had ran out and you've been to busy to get it refilled. so if you're carrying little Rip or little miss Wheeler. you'll have me by your side. I had the utmost joy creating them and I'll have the joy and pleasure raising them" he says before kissing me again.
We walked out the door and headed towards a clinic that would be able to tell us what is going on.
