Shades of Desire

Jace

I gripped the steering wheel so hard that my knuckles turned white, feeling the car lurch beneath me as I sped down the dark road. The night air rushed in through the open window, but it couldn't cool the fire burning inside me. Ivy was pleading with me to slow down, her voice shaky and filled with fear. But all I could think about was how she had gone behind my back to meet Ethan. My heart raced with a mix of anger and hurt, making it hard to concentrate.

"Jace, please! Go slower! You're scaring me!" Ivy cried from the passenger seat, her eyes wide and terrified.

But I didn't care. I pressed the gas even harder, the engine roaring in protest. My mind was a storm of thoughts—how could she do this to me? Why didn't she tell me? I couldn't understand why she'd want to be with him. It felt like a betrayal, and I didn't want to listen to her excuses or justifications.

"I'm fine!" I shouted, barely able to hear myself over the sound of the tires screeching against the asphalt. The world outside blurred into streaks of light and darkness, the headlights of oncoming cars flashing by.

"Jace!" Ivy's voice trembled, growing more frantic. "You're drunk! Just pull over!"

But her words were lost to me. Each time she begged me to slow down, I pressed harder on the accelerator, wanting to escape the pain that churned inside me. I felt trapped, lost in a whirlwind of emotions. The alcohol coursed through my veins, making my head spin, but I didn't care. I wanted to feel something—anything other than the betrayal.

"Jace!" She shouted, and I felt the panic in her voice. It sliced through the haze in my mind, but I pushed it away. I needed to escape, to let the anger fuel me. I wanted to show her how I felt, how hurt I was.

I looked at her, her expression filled with fear. "Just let me drive, please!" she pleaded, but I shook my head.

"Stay out of it, Ivy!" I snapped, my voice harsh. "You don't get to tell me what to do."

Then, just like that, the night turned into a nightmare. A massive truck suddenly appeared in my peripheral vision, and I felt the world tilt beneath me.

"JACE!" Ivy screamed, and that was the last thing I heard before everything went dark.

When I opened my eyes again, the world was spinning. My head was pressed against the steering wheel, and my body felt heavy and disoriented. Pain pulsed through my skull as I took a moment to gather my thoughts, but panic hit me like a ton of bricks when I realized Ivy was gone.

"IVY!" I shouted, the sound echoing in the empty night. I frantically looked around the wrecked car, twisted metal and shattered glass everywhere. My heart raced, each beat pounding in my ears.

I stumbled out of the car, the cold air hitting me like a slap. My legs felt weak, and I had to steady myself against the wreckage. "Ivy!" I called again, fear clawing at my throat as I scanned the ground.

That's when I saw her. My heart dropped, and I felt the ground shift beneath me. Ivy lay there, blood everywhere, her body crumpled like a discarded doll.

"Ivy!" I rushed to her side, falling to my knees in the dirt, my hands trembling as I reached for her. "Please, wake up! Please!"

Her eyes fluttered open, and I saw the pain etched across her face. "Jace..." she whispered, her voice weak, barely audible.

"Don't talk! Just hold on!" I felt tears welling in my eyes, panic flooding my senses. "Please, Ivy, stay with me. I need you to stay with me!"

She tried to lift her hand toward me, but it fell weakly to the side, and my heart shattered. "Jace, it hurts..."

"No, no, no," I cried, feeling my own desperation rise. "You're going to be okay! Just hang on! Help will be here soon!"

As I held her hand, everything came rushing back—memories I tried to bury deep inside me. My mom lying lifeless on the floor, the horror of her overdose, the chaos in the hospital as I waited for news, terrified of losing her. It was all too much.

"I can't do this again, Ivy," I whispered, my voice breaking. "I can't lose you too."

In that moment, it felt like the world was crashing down around me. I was losing control, the weight of everything bearing down on me. The fear I had pushed away came rushing back, a tidal wave of panic.

Ivy's breath grew shallow, and I could feel the warmth of her blood on my hands. "Jace..." she whispered, her eyes closing.

I couldn't take it anymore. I felt the darkness closing in, suffocating me. I couldn't lose her. I couldn't watch her slip away like my mom had.

Without thinking, I jumped to my feet, my heart racing as I staggered away from her. I couldn't stay there. I couldn't face the reality of what was happening. I felt like I was drowning in fear and guilt. I turned and ran, my legs carrying me away from the horror I had created.

I fled into the night, leaving Ivy lying there, bloodied and broken. My heart ached as I ran, but I couldn't stop. The memories of my mom haunted me, pulling me deeper into a darkness I couldn't escape. I felt like I was losing myself, and all I could think about was how I couldn't face it.

But even as I ran, I could hear her voice echoing in my mind. "Jace..."

It was the last thing I wanted to hear. I felt like a coward, abandoning her when she needed me the most, but I couldn't bear to watch her suffer.

As I stumbled away, the world faded into a blur, and all I could think about was how I had let everything slip through my fingers.