My homelands in your eyes

Redemption

3 months later
You were feeling a lot better after the incident after Miguel told you that you did good you didn't kill in cold blood you killed them to keep you and your child safe because who knows what would have happened had they took him. You were currently planing your wedding with Miguel's mom. "Are you sure you don't want to invite anyone for your side of the family." Dita asked "yes I'm sure just my gran, speaking of which I'm going to take Cristobal to see her later she said she has something to tell me." You said with a smile you planned a few more things out then got ready to go to you had been visiting your gran more often after the incident she made you feel at peace but you had never gone to her she always came to you this was the first time your leaving the house without Miguel in the past 3 months. He was a bit weary but you assured him you and Cristobal would be fine. He told you he is doubling the guard and Maria is to go with you but you could go. He's making Maria go because you have episode of depression that come on randomly and although he knew you hadn't had one in a while he still was cautious because when you get like that you push everyone out even him and Cristobal. You were better now so after you were all loaded into the car you let Miguel know he is making you check in every step of the way. Miguel would never tell you but he felt like a failure this was twice now someone has hurt you and he wasn't there to help he feared what might have happened if you were like Emily afraid to defend yourself he knew if it was Emily in that situation the rebels would have his son. He thought that you would be better off on your own, so he packed a bag and was almost out the door when you came back home. "Whats in the bag are we going somewhere." You say as you hand Cristobal to Maria. "No we are not going anywhere I am though." Miguel said. Your face fell "are you leaving me." You ask as tears well up in your eyes. "Why." You ask "I fear I have let you down you have been hurt twice and I wasn't there to keep you safe I'm your soulmate I'm supposed to keep you safe. He said with tears welling up in his eyes. " Miguel is that what this is about you do keep me safe and you provide for me your not a mind reader Miguel you couldn't have known those things would happen you take care of me. You made sure I had the best care after the shooting then you took care of everything after I shot the ones who were trying to take Cristobal you made sure to handle everything and you now and forever make sure that it never touches me you have guards and protective detail on me at all times now you doing a wonderful job I love you." You told him tears now spilling from the both of you. "You really think all those things cause I feel like I've let you down." "Yes I really do think those things you are a wonderful husband and father you keep us safe and well loved." You just stood there holding each other. Then he pulled away and kissed you passionately he pulled you to the bedroom you started to kiss each other again as you pull away you both start pulling each others clothes off. Then you get in the bed and he gets on top of you and kisses you again balancing above you so he doesn't put weight on your baby bump he slowly inserts himself into you and moves slowly inside of you picking up the pace "god your so tight." He said between groans. "I love you so much." He said you he went on for a while then he finished inside you. "I love you so much to daddy." He smiled at you while still hover above you he hadn't pulled out yet you both just basked in each others glow and then he pulled out of you, he walks to the bathroom to turn on the shower while water heated up he scooped you up off the bed and carried you to the shower bridal style. You both showered and you got dressed in underwear and a big t-shirt but Miguel put on black trousers and a white button down shirt and a navy blazer. "Are we good, would it be ok if I went to work it's ok if I can't." He rushed out you giggled "of course we're great Miguel go go I know you have work I'm not upset just stay safe." You said leaning up to kiss him he cups your cheek. "I love you so much." he said in a whisper with his eyes closed. "Please never try to leave me again we all need you." You said "I won't I'm sorry." He then kisses you one more time and walks out of your room. You let Maira take care of Cristobal for a while you nap and then shopped online you order more stuff for the baby. That's when you hear a knock on your bedroom door "come in." You said to the person on the other side of the door. " Ma'am you have a package sorry that it's open Miguel makes us open all package before they can even come on the property." The guard said he handed you the package. "It's ok thank you." You said taking the package from him he then walks out of the room not wanting to be in there for long with the cartel kings half naked wife not that you could see that it just scares him being alone in any room with you. You open the package and it for a woman who hand makes kids clothes you got Cristobal and the new baby matching outfits all kinds of them. You were final ready to get out of bed you slipped on some shorts and went down stairs to your wedding binder Dita was already there looking at it. "There you are I've got some many ideas is that ok." She said. "Of course it's ok you've done this before this is my first time and I don't have my mom to help me and Miguel doesn't want a wedding planner because after the incident he doesn't want me going out that much and he definitely doesn't want anyone to come here so I could use some help." You said with a smile towards her you where standing in the kitchen getting a drink when she say "come sit down make Luisa or one of the other maids get that your pregnant you know Miguel hates when you do to much." Dita says "thats ok I've been resting all day you said and I'm coming now." You said to her now that you had ice water in your cup. You started to make more wedding plans "how was the trip to your grandmothers." She asked as soon as you sat down at the table. "It was good she seems to like the new care giver thats there." You said "I picked her out so I'm glad she likes her if she has any complaints any at all you tell her we will fire her in a moment." You just laugh "ok mom." You said you didn't want to cost anyone their job but you would do anything for your gran. "Yeah I just feel bad sometimes for leaving her alone with someone who was a stranger just a little bit ago." You said to her with a little sadness on your face. "I mean I move out here to take care of her now it feels like I have completely abandoned her." You say as your hormones finally get the best of you and the little sadness that you had was now tears. Dita put her hand on your cheek and stoked it "You haven't abandoned her I know Miguel doesn't want you leaving the house much anymore but we can have her be brought here as much as she wants." She didn't get to say anything else when your mother daughter moment was interrupted by a rush of people. First Miguel and Nestor came in Miguel saw you crying and walk to you and crotch down in front of you "what wrong mi amor why are you crying." Miguel ask stroking your hair with one hand and holding your hand with the other before you could say anything Dita spoke for you. "She feels she has abandoned her grandmother Miguel and it doesn't help you don't let her out a lot." She said with a slight scold. "Is that how you feel." Miguel said as he looked away from his mom to you "yes I mean I don't mind the not going out part because I know if for mine and Cristobal's safety and Im a home body anyway but I can't help but feel like I've abandoned her I mean the only reason I came out here was to take care of her not that I don't love that we have meet because it's the best I just don't want her to feel unloved because we hired someone to take care of her." You said finally getting it off your chest the tears coming harder now. "Oh my baby." Miguel said stoking your cheek now wiping the tears away. "What can I do to fix this we can move her in." He said offering a solution. "Could she." You say with a smile that breaks through the tears. "Of course we have plenty of room we can discuss it with her tomorrow since it's getting late now." He said. "Thank you." You said "no problem baby now what are we doing." Miguel sat in the seat next to you before you could say anything back chef came rushing in. "Oh my God I'm sorry I'm late." Chef said going to the sink to wash his hand you took Miguel's hand to look at his watch it read 7:36 it was late for him but you didn't mind you were just confused by the look of fear on his face until Miguel starts to talk. "Why are you late." Miguel said in a very serious tone. "Um I'm sorry sir ma'am I was out and lost track of time I know I should have called but I didn't realize I was late I'm so sorry." He said looking more scared then you thought necessary but then again you have never had Miguel's anger pointed at you "Didn't I tell you the exact times she need to eat if your going to be completely useless what the point of you having a job here." Miguel said with a raised voice he took your hand as to not scar you. "Like I said I'm so sorry it won't happen again sir." He said the fear still on his face "Your a complete idiot what if she doesn't get the nutrition she needs because you completely useless are you trying to harm our baby." Miguel said now in a full yell you now cut in. "Miguel it's ok I just came down here like an hour ago." You whisper to Miguel you whisper it to him cause you didn't want him to feel like you were undermining him in front of 'the help' as he calls them. "No it's not ok he needs to learn he's a complete idiot he could have harmed you." He said in a softer tone but leaving no room for argument. You didn't say anything Miguel turns his anger back towards the chef. "Now you have an hour to complete all of dinner and have it served and if you go even a second over you're fired you completely useless peasant." Miguel said "Hey come with me to say goodnight to Cristobal." You said to not only calm him down but to also defuse the tension in the room. You took his hand and pulled him to Cristobal room Maria was rocking him to sleep in the rocking chair in the corner of the room. "Do you want him." She said looking at the both of you. "No we haven't eaten yet I'm happy to see at least one person can fallow a schedule and do as they're told." You both step to her she holds him out for you both to kiss him. "Thank you." You whisper to her.