Love Rivals: The Day I Saw Your Tears

107. Failure Is Unaffordable

I forced a small smile and nodded. "Yeah. I'm good," I said, though it felt like a lie.

He began stirring his coffee slowly, his eyes never leaving me. "Last time, I didn't get the chance to ask you in front of everyone. Are you really doing okay? I mean... how are things with Ryan? Is he treating you well?"

I looked away for a second, gathering my thoughts. "He's... he's good to me," I said. "His father and I don't really get along, but his mom is sweet. Ryan even stood up to his dad for the first time. Can you believe that?" I let out a small laugh, though it felt hollow.

Vicky leaned forward, his face softening. "Are you happy with him? With the marriage?"

I paused, not knowing how to answer. "I'm... I'm not sure. I don't even know if I'm playing the role of a wife or a daughter-in-law in that house. But, we're... comfortable. We share the same space without much trouble. We tolerate each other's presence."

He studied me for a moment and then gave a relieved smile. "That's good to hear. I'm glad you're okay," he said gently.

I hesitated, the weight of what I had to say pressing down on me. "Vicky... are you good at keeping secrets?" I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.

Without missing a beat, he replied, "Pretty good."

I bit my lip before asking, "I mean, can you keep secrets from Ryan? If I tell you something, would you keep it from him?"

Vicky's expression grew more serious, his voice quieter. "Of course. Ryan's my best friend, but I've kept plenty of things from him before. Don't worry, Sarah. You can trust me."

His words made me feel a bit better, but the truth was still stuck in my throat, waiting for the right moment to come out.

I took a deep breath, feeling the weight of my confession pressing against my chest. "Vicky," I started, my voice slightly trembling, "I need to be honest with you. I lied to you and the others."

His eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he leaned in closer. "What do you mean? What's going on?"

"I'm not working an online job," I continued, forcing myself to maintain eye contact. "In fact, I don't even have an MBA. I've never had a job. I just graduated with a degree in zoology, and for the past few months, I've been juggling part-time gigs. So right now, I'm basically unemployed."

He took a quick sip from his coffee, and before he could respond, I rushed to add, "Please, you have to keep this between us. Don't tell Ryan. I can't bear the thought of facing him, feeling like I've failed."

Vicky's expression shifted, turning from confusion to concern. "Why would you lie about something like this?" he asked gently.

"I'm twenty-six, and I feel completely lost," I admitted, feeling a wave of vulnerability wash over me. "I don't even know what my next steps should be. How could I face my friends who seem to have it all figured out? It's just... embarrassing and unaffordable."

Vicky leaned back in his chair, his gaze thoughtful. "I get it. It must be really difficult for you to see us moving forward while you feel stuck. Especially since you were the top student in school. The pressure must be suffocating."

I nodded, appreciating his understanding. "Exactly. I feel like everyone expects so much from me, and here I am, not even knowing what I want to do with my life."

He set his cup down with a soft clink and met my eyes. "Don't worry, Sarah. Your secret is safe with me. I'm actually glad you felt comfortable enough to share this with me. It means a lot."

Relief washed over me at his words. For the first time in a while, I felt like someone even though couldn't understood my struggles, but it lightened the burden, if only a little.

As Vicky and I continued our conversation, I felt a sense of comfort in sharing our experiences. He opened up about the challenges of running his business, explaining how difficult it had been to navigate recent downturns. I, in turn, shared snippets of my married life, the ups and downs, and the peculiar dynamics of living under the same roof with Ryan.

Just as the conversation began to flow, Ryan burst into the café. He strode over to our table, a determined look on his face.

"Hey, we need to go shopping," he declared, rapping his knuckles lightly on the table for emphasis. "Mom wants you to pick out some new dresses."

I frowned, my instinct to resist kicking in. "But I don't need any new dresses," I protested, trying to assert my independence.

Without missing a beat, Ryan grabbed my hand, pulling me gently but firmly from my seat. I quickly reached for my purse with my other hand, glancing back at Vicky. "I'll talk to Krystal about it later," I said, trying to keep my voice steady despite the sudden shift in focus. "She might be of some help. Bye for now!"