Aapki Ardhangini

22. Her Waistchain

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"Vapis chal dijiye na humare sath...."

"Come back with me..."

She asked me with very hopeful eyes. There was pain and hope for my yes hidden in her voice.

I gulped and divert my gaze from her eyes to other side.

"Aur unka kya jo sawal aapne humse kiye the"

"And what about those questions you asked me ?"

"Rana ji, biwi hai hum aapki...nahi banna chahte the. Aap hi hath tham kar laye hai hume. Kya itna sa haq nahi hai hume ki aap raat kahi aur guzare aur hum apse sawal bhi na kare. Karte bhi nahi agar us jagah aapko us halat me na dekhte"

"Rana ji, I am your wife....didn't want to be.You are the one who brought me by holding my hand.Don't I have this little right that you spend the night somewhere else and I don't even question you.Wouldn't have done it if I hadn't seen you in that condition at that place."

Her words shook my soul. Her every words pierce my heart.She is already very hurt.Some sorrow was given to her by her parents and family. And today I am causing her even more pain than that.I want to sit at her feet and apologize for this crime of mine.

I forward my hand and hold her hand.

"Ragini"

I can see the waves that started rising inside her as soon as I held her hand.

"Aap jaaiye....hum nahi aa sakte."

"You go...I can't come."

She jerked her hand away from mine.

"Ab aapse...ab aapse aane ko nahi kahenge aur na hi puchenge ki ye sab chal kya raha hai lekin jaan kar to rahenge aap ye sab kar kyu rahe hai"

"Now I will not ask you to come nor will I ask you what is going on.But I would like to know why you are doing all this."

She said in a very aggressive tone.She got angry and went away stomping her feet.

I closed my eyes to feel the touch of her. I look at my empty hand and make a fist.

"Humari mushkilo ko aur na badhiya Ragini."

"Don't add to my troubles Ragini."

I kiss the same fist with which I held her hand.

I clapped twice to ask for an attendee.

She came.

"Food should be given to the queen and sleeping medicine should be mixed in it in equal quantity. And if she don't eat then mix it in her herbal tea."

She left after taking my order.

I went straight on the bed to rest.

"How can I tell you, Ragini, how lonely i feel without you.Without you this velvet bed pricks me like thorns...I was never like this...how much I have changed since I fell in love....With You"

I take a deep breath and calm down my self. I have to go through a lot. I can't broke like this because of love only.

I spent the middle of the night entangled in these things.