Lansy One Shots

Are You Flirting With Me?

Summary: Pansy has escaped the scrutiny of the British wizarding public, recreating herself in America as a real estate mogul. She's perfected her persona over the years since the war, hiding away, but when you get infested with wrackspurts there's only one thing to do.

Ship: LunaLovegood/PansyParkinson

All credit goes to disillusionist9 on Ao3

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Pansy narrowed her eyes at the placard in front of her, bronze and more than a little weathered:

No smoking

The cigarette between her lips shook up and down as she laughed. Dark red lipstick stains circled the butt as she extinguished it on the wall holding the sign, one among dozens of dark circles. No smoking in the back alley of a club was ludicrous, and nearly impossible to enforce, but the owners likely didn't realize the sign was still there, since the building was re-purposed more than ten times in the last three years.

Pansy preferred dark corners to curl into, even years since she'd last seen someone she recognized in the wizarding community. As an expat in New York City she enjoyed a level of anonymity she wouldn't have in Europe. Buying and flipping buildings with the money she immediately withdrew from Gringotts after the war filled the days in a way she hadn't expected would be so satisfying. Niggling into the monopoly of ownership in the City, blasting through the male-dominated community, buttered her bread. Literally and figuratively.

Adjusting the strap on her heel, securing it more tightly around her ankle, she saw the edges of a pale dress and rolled over Converse before she heard the woman speak.

"Pansy!"

She was on guard at once, after years of going by Isabelle, hearing her given name was disorienting.

Luna Lovegood. Luna fucking Lovegood stood there behind the club with her, in the middle of the night in New York City. With her head cocked to the side, and a damnable smile across her lips. She dressed the way Pansy always imagined, with flowing dresses and unbound hair, begging for Pansy's fingers to run through it, like she had...once...when they were still at Hogwarts.

"But you go by Isabelle Indigo, now," she said, barreling through Pansy's discomfort and scattered memories. "I like the alliteration."

Unsure of how to reply before hexing her and booking it away, Pansy cleared her throat and muttered a hesitant thank you.

Sensing her unease, Luna smiled broader, and spread her arms in front of her. "I'm not here to take you home, Pansy. Or do you prefer Isabelle? Doesn't seem like you like Pansy much anymore. I'm not with the Ministry, I'm here looking for American wrackspurt specimens, and they're most active at night."

Pansy remained silent, the scent of her cigarette still lingering in her nostrils. She couldn't help the moment of fight or flight taking over her body as she gauged what the blonde wanted, if it wasn't taking her back to England, because wack-sports sounded like the worst excuse for a diversion ever.

"I'm lucky I ran into you, I'm sure you've seen some. You're showing all the signs."

Luna advanced on her so quickly she didn't have time to react, but instead of forcefully grabbing her or sticking her hand on a Portkey, Luna pushed her fingertips into Pansy's short bob. Damn if her thin hands didn't start rubbing into her scalp, forcing her eyelids to droop in pleasure, better than any hairdresser or masseuse ever had accomplished.

"Definitely wrackspruts. Your brain is all fuzzy, but you're doing very well with your infestation. I could take care of them for you, but you'd need to buy me a drink at one of your hotels first and tell me what you've done today, so I can find the source of the 'spurts."

Shocked at her closeness, wondering how the girl who'd haunted Pansy's dreams in school could be real and here and threading her hands through her hair. "Are you...flirting with me?"

"Yes," Luna said bluntly. "The best cure for wrackspurts is orgasm, and I am more than happy to help with that."

Pansy sputtered, shocked into laughter. "Luna, you're absolutely bonkers...but that is not the worst pick up line I've ever gotten."

Luna, face still inches from hers, still smiling, chuckled and removed her hands from Pansy's hair. "How about that drink?"