Do You Even Care? / STYLE SOUTHPARK

☆ Chapter 18 ☆

...Butters' POV...

On Friday I finally decide to go back to school. I get into some new clothes for the day and brush my teeth in the Tuckers' bathroom. They've been real kind, letting me stay here and all. It's making me feel guilty, honestly, I don't want to leech off them so I figure I'll leave their house sometime this weekend.

I don't have any of my stuff for school but I figure it's better to be there with nothing them to keep skipping. It's just... it's been hard. School just sounded like another problem that I had no energy to deal with.

But I'm going back today.

There's a knock on the room door and I turn around. "Come in," I call out.

"Hey, you ready to go?" Craig asks, his backpack already slung over one shoulder.

"Yeah, just a second," I smile.

He nods, walking away. I've never been close with Craig but I've gotten to know him over the last few days. He likes space and guinea pigs. He's very good at science. Also, I've learned that Tweek boxes and that Craig goes to all of his matches, I thought that was cute.

I slide my shoes on and tie them, pulling at the laces so they'll be even. I leave the room, shutting the door behind me carefully.

Craig and I leave his house without another word exchanged. We walk about halfway to the school before either of us says anything.

"How've you been dealing with... it?" Craig asks.

I know by it he means being kicked out. I can sense his hesitation it bring it up, maybe because he can sense my reluctance to so much as think about it. "Oh. I guess I've been trying my best," I mumble back in reply.

He nods as we stop at a crossing for a car to drive through. I expect him to say something but he doesn't. "It sure is nice out this morning, don't you think so?" I ask in a desperate attempt to break the silence.

He doesn't say anything for a moment. Then he takes in a deep breath. "I'm sorry this is all happening to you," he says rather than reply to my question.

I feel his words phase right through me like I'm a ghost. Something about those words makes my soul leave my body for a split second and then re-enter it again just as quickly. I blink a few times, feeling a bit disoriented.

"It's fine," I tell him, even though I know it's not.

...

When we get to school I wander around campus mindlessly. Then I hear a voice from behind me, "Holy shit. Butters?

I turn and see Kenny, I knew it was him from the moment I heard his voice but seeing his face feels different. I feel my heart constrict in my chest and a lump rise in my throat. Kenny.

He looks shocked and exhausted, his hair is a mess and his eyes have dark bags under them. We stare at eachother for a moment.

"Where were you? He asks. "I was so worried."

"Sorry," is all I manage to say.

He stares at me, waiting for me to answer his question. I can't even look at him, I stare at my feet.

"Butters—"

"He kicked me out," I blurt out, cutting Kenny off. I watch as Kenny's eyes widen. "He found out about us and he kicked me out. I guess he was tired of paying to send me to conversion therapy."

I feel his arms wrap around me and squeeze me tight and I feel my eyes start to water. I wrap my arms just as tightly around him and I try to not cry. One of his hands runs slowly through my hair and I take a deep breath, slowly pulling away from him.

"That fucking sucks."

"Yeah," is all I say in reply. "He took my phone or else I woulda called," I tell him.

Kenny nods and looks to be searching for words to say. "Where have you been staying?" he asks me.

"Oh, the Tuckers' have been real sweet, they let me stay there but I feel bad leaching off of them," I admit to him.

"So where are you gonna go then?" he asks me, eyebrows slightly furrowed.

I shrug, honestly, I hadn't thought that far. I'll have to figure something out I suppose.

"Come to my house. I mean we don't have a lot, we're still poor as shit but you can stay in my room and I can find a way to make some spare cash, for food, I always can."

I feel my eyes widen and even though this is a terrible circumstance for it to be happening under I have to admit that I'm excited to live with him. Sharing a bed, walking to the bus stop together, and making food together. It all sounds wonderful.

"My parents won't give a shit as long as we dont bother them," he assures me before I can even ask.

I feel my lips turn into a slight smile, "Ok."

"Ok?" Kenny smiles back at me.

I just smile at him as he slowly draws closer to me and grabs my cheek, brushing his thumb slowly across my skin. He kisses me, gently, carefully. And for a moment I feel better.