Burning Love ~ Billy Hargrove ( +18)

Chapter 39

Maddie's POV
Thursday, December 21, 1984
Winter Ball

I was still so overwhelmed with happiness, feeling good and knowing that everything was fine between Steve and me... But it was clear I said all of that without thinking about the consequences. Look, I truly meant it. I knew he needed it, especially after everything that happened with Neil and knowing that he was there for me. And I needed it too, but maybe I shouldn't have said it. Because I was convinced that the way I needed him and the way he needed me were not the same.

Damn it, Maddie, you screwed up again. Stay still for once!

Then why did you practically run away and avoid talking about what happened last night?

"Why can't we just leave things as they are? Last night was great, but I don't want to hurt you. We need to forget it, please. I don't want you to suffer because of me."

"I can't, Madeleine..." he let go of me and stepped away, but not too far.

"Why not? I'm not the only girl you've spent just one night with and then went on with your life as normal. And you can still be my friend, something you couldn't do with the others," I moved closer to him, but he took another step back. "Steve, please. I know you're not the same guy who used to do these things anymore. But please, try one more time. I don't want to mess things up more than I already have," regret was consuming me at an alarming pace.

"I can't, Maddie," Steve said firmly, his gaze piercing through me.

"But why?"

"Damn it, because I love you, Madeleine," he threw his arms up in resignation and exclaimed, his eyes never leaving mine, "I love you!"

"W-What did you say?" My body froze completely, unable to process how to react.

"I said I love you," he stepped closer, cupping my face in his hands. "I love you, Madeleine Mayfield."

My body still wouldn't respond. It was the first time a man had ever told me he loved me. The first time in my life someone had felt something like this for me, and I... I didn't know what I felt. Did I love him the way he loved me? Or did I just like him? Or maybe I only cared for him as a friend? Or perhaps... did I love him, or did I love Billy? Was it even possible to love them both?

Confusion began to overwhelm me, and a heavy pressure settled on my chest. Steve was still holding my face in his large hands, probably waiting for a response that I was taking far too long to give.

But the words wouldn't come out of my mouth. I had never been in a situation like this before.

He leaned in slowly, his face moving closer to mine. He got so near that nothing more than the width of a pin could fit between our mouths. Instinctively, I closed my eyes and silently prayed for him not to do it.

But Steve's lips pressed against mine. He kissed me, long and softly, and when he pulled back, his fingers brushed over my lips. His hands were trembling.

"Stop, please." I pulled back slightly as he tried to kiss me again. "This isn't real..." I whispered, my voice trembling. "Tell me this isn't real."

"Maddie..."

"I'm such an idiot. A complete fool. I never should have crossed that line—I knew it. This was a huge mistake." I backed away from him, running my fingers anxiously through my hair.

"It wasn't a mistake, Maddie. It just made me realize that you're not just someone I like. I think... I think I'm falling for you," he said, stepping closer.

"Don't do this to me, Steve. You promised me when we met that you wouldn't fall for me. You promised me, dammit!" I shoved him before he could reach me.