Funky's Unwanted Promise

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[Contains mature subjects in a friendly way possible...]

Brightness blinded Funky's eyes for a minute, he adjust to the light until he makes out he's in the sky once you die.

He turns around to see two doors in front of him, one leading Heaven and the other Hell.

"Funky, do you want to know your record?"

Funky: "What, who are you?"

"Do not question me, answer what I asked!"

Funky: "Alright jeez, let's hear my judgement..."

"For your entire life, you have been nothing but a major arsehole. Being sexist, racist, homophobic, privileged and overall a hater to just every living things- not just humans!"

Funky: "But I thought being queer was a sin, well I can excuse other topic."

"It is a sin but the your actions are worse also you're supposed to leave them alone instead of being invasive, you're still a jerk."

Funky: "Damn, I'm ready to go now, are you gonna open the door then?"

"Yes, you may now enter."

The door of Hell unlocks, Funky slowly walks over the edge at the clouds until he gets shoved off.

He falls yet again through the flaming cave, landing with a loud thud that's really dusty.

He picks himself up to look around, brushing off the dirt from his clothes.

Expo: "Hello Funky, welcome to Hell."

Funky: "Expo, what are you doing here? I thought you were a great person, better than me!"

Expo: "I'm a lesbian, I had a crush on a non-binary..."

Funky: "Oh, well that sucks... guess that makes us equal-"

Expo: "No it doesn't, Hell has different levels to punish the sinners!"

Funky: "Yikes, what rank are you at?"

Expo: "the first one, it's just for the gays... we're all alone, bored with our partner, friends or even family."

Funky: "That's why I can see you, I'm like a stranger..."

Expo: "You're probably the second last position, since I'm surprised you haven't graped any person."

Funky: "Grape, why the fruit- oh... censored."

Expo: "Well at least we know the world can be cruel, there's a balance for everything..."

Funky: "Listen Expo, I'm sorry for what I did to you."

Expo: "It's too late, Funky... You had weeks to forgive when we were alive, you didn't take that chance. I won't forgive you and you're still below me, it's not gonna change your reputation..."

Funky: "Dang, I do deserve this. Can we talk more before I leave, I feel like I have to explain myself why I'm like this?"

Expo: "I don't know what different it makes, but go on..."

Funky: "I grew up with no father, had to be taught around women from my mother and sister... I was forced to be manly for them since they don't have one, I supposed in my wrong young mind that I took that role to use in toxic power of masculinity."

Expo: "You got send here from what you did is horrible, you were send with ladies who tell you about your condition which you didn't even listen to them!"

Funky: "I better go, I'm not gonna change even if I stayed longer beside you..."

Expo: "Wait- Funky, there's one more I don't know yet..."

Funky: "What now, Expo?"

Expo: "Barnett- he's a... man, why didn't you hear him?"

Funky: "I heard him, alright... I told him if he he did something that goes against me, I would have done terrible things to him."

Expo: "How awful, I'm sure he would have picked death over misery?"

Funky: "I did use a torture method, I touched him in sensitive area- not the private ones... if he utters a word about us."

Expo: "My goodness, you're just worse than I could ever imagine..."

Funky: "It doesn't mean I'm a grape lover, I belong to the second stage like you mentioned-"

Expo: "I'll shove you to the last section once you're not looking, he's still a victim even if you haven't gone further."

Funky: "I'm gonna get my eyes observed 24/7, see you around..."

Expo: "Funky, how long has that been going?"

Funky: "Multiple times actually, I manipulate him thinking if he listen to me then I'll be able to like him so he mistaken it being affection that he seem guessing I'm flirting with him instead."

Expo: "You're the worse, I will never forgiving you!''

Funky: "Fair enough, goodbye."