who am i?

need

Author's Note: thank you to those who've followed me and commented such nice things on the last chapter!! I appreciate it so much. I can't write all the time but I tried to finish this as quickly as possible while also trying to make it good!! I hope you guys like it!

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Doctors and nurses drifted in and out of my room for a while, doing tests and prescribing medicine for the headaches I was going to get.

Phil was by my side the entire time, making sure I ate more than enough food and stayed hydrated and all.

Over the course of a few hours I began remembering. I remembered awkward situations I've been stuck in, my family, and some of my childhood friends.

But 2008 and onward are empty. Like I'm missing a chunk of my life; I'm missing Phil.

Where does he fit in my life? What does he even want to do with me? I'm just a clumsy dork. He seems sweet and loyal, not to mention he's attractive... Why does he like me? What makes me so special?

"Are you okay?" Phil asked me.

That brought me back to reality. Do I usually think so lowly of myself?

"Yeah! Yeah I'm all good. I mean, apart from not remembering who you are and all." After saying that I immediately regretted it. "I'm sorry, that sounded harsh. I mean I just-"

Phil cut me off, "You don't have to explain; I understand." He smiled, though it didn't feel genuine.

I smiled back, though I'm sure mine didn't look genuine either.

After a few more hours of tests the doctors said I could go home tomorrow.

I just had to spend one more night.

I tried to sleep but I just couldn't. What happened to me? I wanted answers. In fact, I need answers.

Need...

I was remembering something again...

I was in a park, no... We were in a park. Phil and I were holding hands walking along a cement path surrounded by grass.

Suddenly we came upon a wooden bench that overlooked a lake. The bench had the engraving "D+P" carved into the back.

Phil and I sat on the bench, saying nothing, just watching the sun glisten on the lake's surface before setting for the night.

Just as the sky was turning orange and pink, Phil turned to me, holding both my hands in his.

I sighed, looking into his bright blue eyes, "Is this about to become a major cheese fest?" I said sarcastically.

He chuckled and nodded before speaking, "Dan, from the moment I first saw you I knew you were going to be an important part of my life. And we've been dating for just over a year now... I know you like to take things slow but I can't just keep beating around the bush.

I love you. I knew I loved you from day one but I just have to say it."

I smiled back at him, "I love you too." I leaned in to hug him but he gently pushed me back.

"But Dan you don't understand. The word 'love' doesn't even come close to being an accurate representation of how I feel about you. This is super cheesy and I know, I'm sorry, but I just can't keep quiet anymore."

I hugged him then, happy tears in my eyes. "Thank you Phil, I love you."

He squeezed me tighter, "I don't know what I'd be without you. I need you Dan."

Then it was over.

I looked to Phil, who was asleep in a chair that looked highly uncomfortable.

He looks so different now compared to the memory. He had dark circles around his eyes and looked much more thin. Has he eaten?

I felt my stomach twist. He loves me, and I loved him. I must be causing him so much pain.

But that chair he's in must be causing him some pain too.

I brought him, half asleep, over to the hospital bed. It's not meant for two people, but I'll make it work... For his sake.

We both laid down, and as I laid on my back he turned towards me and rested his head on my chest, hugging me while doing so.

Now this, I could get used to.