who am i?

phil

Author's Note: This one was rough to write. I just couldn't stop the plot twists. Cried a few times; just a heads up. Hope you enjoy this one way or another! Don't kill me please! Possible trigger warning! I'M SORRY!

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Phil and I sat watching Doctor Who for a while and soon Phil was asleep...

On top of me.

I didn't mind of course, but I just wish I could talk to him about everything. About how he feels, what he's been doing, how I got to the hospital... I just wanted to know all the details.

I wasn't even really paying attention to the show... I was just letting my mind wander. As time went on I only became curiouser and curiouser as to what actually happened that night.

But I didn't have to wonder long.

Phil started slightly moving his head back and forth in his sleep and after a minute the action became more violent. He was mumbling very quietly, "No... No... Dan..." He furrowed his eyebrows and the words began getting louder to the point where he was shouting, "No... Dan... DAN! NO!"

I jumped as Phil jolted awake into an upright sitting position; crying and looking around frantically. His eyes met mine; both of us looking terrified.

He was slightly shaking... What happened in his nightmare?

"C-Can I hug you?" He asked. He looked so broken. It hurt to see him that way but it hurt more that he felt the need to ask if he could hug me.

I wish I was the same person I was before. I wish he felt at home with me again.

I nodded, "Of course."

He sighed of relief and I pulled him into a hug. He held onto me tightly and cried, "I'm so sorry... Dan I'm so sorry..."

"Shh... It's okay... Phil it's okay. Hey... Hey look at me..." I said softly, trying to comfort him.

He looked up at me and I continued, "I'm here. And I love you. And even though-"

Phil's expression changed from helpless to angry and he stood up quickly then cut me off, pacing back and forth, "Don't you DARE say that! You don't even remember who I am, let alone who you are! How can you love someone you don't even know? I love you with all I am, Dan! Do you remember how that feels? If you ever even felt that at all... You don't understand..."

I stood up and moved to meet his gaze, "What happened? After I... Passed out...?"

He broke our eye contact and it was as if you could see him replaying everything in his mind for just a moment before he sighed and looked back up at me.

"Okay..." He said.

-Phil's Flashback-

"Okay Phil, you got this." I spoke to myself as I tried to maneuver the many bags I was holding to reach my key.

I finally grabbed hold of it and, feeling proud, I opened the door.

"Dan?" I shouted, shutting the door behind me with my foot. "Dan it's me!"

Red flag: no sarcastic response.

Usually Dan will say, 'Phil I know you're home when the door opens, only you have a key.' Or 'Are you going to say that every time?'

But today... Nothing.

Remembering the way he's been acting lately, I began to worry.

"Dan..?" I said a bit louder, hoping he just didn't hear me the first time.

Still nothing.