1d Sickfics

|19| Eating Disorder (Liam)

TW apply, please don't read if this would trigger you :))

Liam's POV

"Liam hurry up, I have to pee!" Niall pounded on the door.

I turned around to face the door and immediately felt dizzy. My head spun and the air in my lungs seemed to disappear.

I stood in the bathroom staring at the mirror. I looked at myself with disgust as I noted everything I had to do today. We had rehearsals, 3 interviews, and a concert tonight.

I know I should eat something. I can't. I won't. I can go a little longer.

"Interview is in 3 hours," Louis informed me and I nodded sluggishly while stepping out of the bathroom.

I found my bunk and decided to rest for a little while. Lying down I immediately fell asleep. In what only felt like minutes, Zayn was shaking me awake.

"Li, come on, we're going to be late." I stood up quickly which caused me to sway a bit on my feet. My legs shook unsteadily as I gripped the wall.

"You okay Liam? You look horrible." Zayn expressed his concern briefly but I shrugged him off.

"Gee, thanks. I'm fine." Pushing past Zayn, I hurried outside and into the building, ignoring the sudden breathlessness.

"Liam, come on, quit dragging your feet." One of the boys yelled. I nodded and picked up my pace as we went inside.

You're a failure, even the boys think you are. Why can't you keep up? Skipping a few meals will only make you stronger, skinnier, better.

I nodded at my thoughts. In reality, it had been more than a few meals. It had been days. But as long as no one caught on, I was winning.

"5 minutes!" A manager yelled, making me jump. I stood to line up and my vision clouded. The boys exchanged confused glances with each other and at me, but I just ignored it.

We walked on stage and the world tilted around me. I blinked heavily and tried desperately to clear my vision.

I collapsed onto the couch next to Louis who shot me a confused glance. I flashed a charming smile and he bought it.

The interview went by slowly, every passing minute feeling like hours. Every question directed at me felt like a personal attack, they were trying to catch me off guard.

When the interview finally ended, I was the first one off-stage and into my dressing room.

I heard the boys call after me, trading some confused hums. I couldn't think straight anymore. My heart was pounding inside my chest. The sounds around me became muffled, my breath hitched. I groped around the room for something to hold myself up with. The world shifted and the ground came closer into my view. I heard a loud crack as pain exploded through my head. Then—darkness.

***

When I woke up, it was silent. My eyelids fluttered open and closed and I took slow, deep breaths. In a matter of seconds, the light blinded my eyes and sound became present. My limbs felt heavy, too heavy to move. It was like my arms were replaced with 300-pound weights. The ache in my head was prominent and never fading. My eyes watered in pain but I would not cry.