"but people are hardly ever who you think they are, especially when you love them." Mum's words echoed in my head that evening as I tossed and turned in bed trying to get comfortable. Pansy threw a pillow at me as she flicked on the light.
"What is wrong with you? I'm trying to sleep and you're making it impossible with all the noise." She groaned as I heard her yank back her curtain, the metal rings screeching on the bar that held them up.
"I'm sorry, it's nothing." I told her as I pulled back my own. Her face softened. She sat up to face me.
"What's wrong, Ella?"
Ella. The nickname she gave me to piss me off when we hated each other. She pretended she didn't know my name. Over the years it became endearing, only used when things were truly terrible. The last time she used it was when she came out to me, she thought I was going to put in for a room change and never speak to her again. I told her she was a right idiot.
"I talked to my mum earlier and she just said something that's stuck with me." I shook my head, it was silly really. My friends weren't Peter. They weren't going to betray me in war and ruin my life. It was a silly argument and silly feelings every teenager has.
"What'd she say?" She asked. I sighed heavily.
"She told me we hardly ever know who someone really is, especially when we love them." I repeated. Pansy blew out a long breath.
"Merlin. That's rough." She admitted. I nodded. "Well now I'll be up the rest of the night thinking about it. It was about Theo?"
"Yeah."
"But you chose Enz?"
"I did." Pansy sighed.
"Look, kid, this is going to suck to hear but I have to say it. Theodore is one of us, he basically grew up in your house. Your nan and granddad love him. He loves you. You love him. You guys did what you did, had what you had. But in the end, you did know him. You knew from the jump he was a risk, he held all the power and could make everything come tumbling down. You just didn't think he would do it to you. Matty saw it, Enzo saw it, shit, even Draco saw it. Me and you though? We never thought it would have done that to you. So, yeah, maybe love blinds people or whatever but you knew him. You knew what he was capable of. But you took a chance because that's you. You see the best in people, you think we're all indestructible, it's who you are. I wouldn't change that about you, but you have to decide if you want to- if you want to let Theo change that about you." She lectured. I took a deep breath, feeling like she'd knocked all the wind out of me.
"I need to talk to Theo." Pansy cocked her head to the side.
"Alright, not really what I meant, but do what you must." She replied. I laughed before throwing her pillow back at her.
"Go to sleep, we'll deal with it tomorrow."
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Morning came three hours later. I'd hardly slept. I shrugged on my robes, Pans smoothed her hair down and gave me a look.
"You're still doing this?" I nodded.
"I think I have to." I pulled the door open, the boys waited for us in the common room. Theo stood watching the giant squid swim around. I leaned down next to Enz.
"I need to talk to him." I told him as I gestured towards Theo. His brow furrowed together. "I need to tell him he's a fucking idiot, but he's still my brother."
"Potter, I know our family tree is more of a-"
"Shut up Draco." Me and Pansy chorused together. Enzo kissed the side of my head.
"Do what you have to do." He told me softly. I kissed his cheek before straightening up and walking over to him.
"Here to play more stupid games?" He asked, not once looking over at me. I chuckled.
"I've won enough stupid prizes." He didn't laugh. He just dug his nails into his palm and stared straight ahead.
"What do you want, Elenora?" I felt like he smacked me with the use of my full name. I swallowed hard.
"I came to tell you that you really hurt me. You messed me up in ways I didn't know were possible,"
"This is great, exactly how I want to start my day."
"Will you let me finish you annoying git?" He nodded. "You really, and I mean really, screwed with my head Theo but for some reason I can't make that erase all the memories we have together. You're my best friend, you always have been. Whatever this was, that's long over but hopefully we can be friends again someday because you used to be my family. I don't like losing family."
"I meant it when I said I'd be in the wings, El."
"I meant it when I said I didn't want you there. I want you to be my friend again. I want your stupid jokes and your idiotic rambling when you're high. I want you to sleep in your room at my parent's house and join us for Christmas at nan's." He chuckled lowly.
"I don't know if I'll ever stop trying to get you, if I'll ever get over you really." I rolled my eyes.
"You'll find enough blondes to manage." He finally cracked a smile and looked over at me.
"I don't blondes are my thing anymore." I let out a loud laugh before covering my mouth.
"You Theodore Nott are full of shit, you've always loved a blonde." He chuckled again.
"Maybe you're right." I turned my whole body to face him, he did the same. I opened my arms for a hug, he accepted.
"No touching!" Matty yelled. I flipped him off.
"Oh, fuck off Riddle." Theo groaned. I pulled out of the hug.
"Fix shit with them. We all miss you."
"Enzo doesn't." He muttered. I smacked his arm.
"Yes he does. You were his best friend before you were mine."
"I don't know if you remember, but I fucked over the girl he's been in love with since he first saw her." I rolled my eyes.
"How could I forget?" He cracked a small smile. "Figure it out. You always do."
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hi it's been forever, how are yall? i've missed you. if you want to read a book i actually update more than once every blue moon check out thin ice, it's a modern day marauders college au <3
