Sunsets

4. We are not okay

Yasmine 

I'm a goner, somebody catch my breath,

I'm a goner, somebody catch my breath,

I want to be known by you,

I want to be known by you.

I'm a goner, somebody catch my breath,

I'm a goner, somebody catch my breath,

I want to be known by you,

I want to be known by you.

As I sit in the courtyard underneath a shady tree listening to music, I can't help but think about my past.

Home was never my favorite place to be. Not the worst because i knew that a lot of other people probably had it bad, but i preferred not to be there. Constant arguing, yelling, drama. It never ended. Never silence. That was all I wanted. 

When I was younger none of the drama really bothered me. It was always my mom and 2 older sisters who would never stop. But as i reached teenage years it all went bad.

Though I'm weak and beaten down,

I'll slip away into this sound,

The ghost of you is close to me,

I'm inside-out, you're underneath.

All I wanted was for it to be silent.

All I wanted was for all of it to just stop.

And then I met him.

He was my escape.

He was the one person who really knew me. He knew that when I would woke up in the morning, I would paint on a smile to make it through the day. That all my laughs and jokes were just a wall I had built. He somehow managed to save me from myself. 

I've got two faces, blurry's the one I'm not,

I've got two faces, blurry's the one I'm not,

I need your help to take him out,

I need your help to take him out.

He knew about my drama filled life. My father had left me when i was 8, after that nothing was the same. My mom and him had not been together since i was a baby anyways. But when your dad moves 1300 miles away to be with some lady and make a new family, it hurts. Of course, his way of saying we were okay, was him paying for my college. 

We are not okay.

That didn't really fazed my family though. My mom didn't love him anymore, and he was not my sister's dad. They're dad was around somewhere, he tries to keep in contact with them but they don't care. They don't care about anything. Being an addict has that affect on you. 

Though I'm weak and beaten down,

I'll slip away into this sound,

The ghost of you is close to me,

I'm inside-out, you're underneath.