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깊은 끝

hyunjin's leg was bouncing up and down, biting his nails anxiously.

the door of the room finally opened and doctor walked in, making hyunjin immediately stand up.

"so? how is it?"
hyunjin asked, feeling his heart beating faster and faster.

the doctor sighed, giving hyunjin an apologetic look.
"we checked mr. lee. unfortunately, the cancer came back. we checked the records of his previous results, and it's worse then it was the last time. we will start treatment, and give it the best we have, but I have to be honest with you, and make clear that his chance of actually recovering is very slim."

hyunjin felt his heart break into million pieces. he looked on his left, where his unconscious boyfriend was laying.

felix and hyunjin were standing on a bridge, the stars the only thing surrounding them.
this was it, this was the time.

hyunjin's heart was beating fast.
he was about to propose to his boyfriend.
who wouldn't be nervous?

felix was looking at the stars on the sky, and hyunjin thought that this was the perfect time.
he was about to reach into his pocket, when a whine of pain from felix stopped him.

he immediately looked at his boyfriend, seeing him holding his head.

"hey, baby, what's wrong? are you okay?"
hyunjin asked, putting his hand on Felix's shoulder.

"yeah, I'm fine. my head just started hurting, that's all. I didn't drink enough water today."
felix said with a small smile, putting his hand down again.

hyunjin nodded, caressing Felix's shoulder comfortingly.

for a few seconds, they were staring at the stars, before Felix turned to look at hyunjin with a huge smile on his face.
"jinnie, I...."
his body suddenly went limp, falling down.

hyunjin caught him, panic in his eyes.
"felix? baby?"

tears were in hyunjin's eyes, letting the doctor's words settle in.
"so you're saying that...he's not going to make it?"

"well, of course that there is a chance that he's going to, it's just really, really slim. the cancer is already spreading trough his body."

"he's going to make it."
hyunjin said.
"he's strong. stronger then anyone else I know. he's going to be okay."

the doctor just gave him a small sad smile, patting hyunjin's shoulder, before walking away.

•~•

it has been an exhausting month.
felix insisted on getting treated at home, because being in the hospital again, in the same situation, just made him anxious and scared, and even tho hyunjin tried to convince him to stay because of all the care he would get there, at the end, he couldn't do anything about it.

day by day, the life got sucked out of felix. his eyes slowly but surely lost their spark, and he has been getting weaker and weaker.

hyunjin walked into his atelier holding a cup of tea, seeing his boyfriend wrapped in a blanket, looking at the sunset trough the glass wall.

sitting down next to him, hyunjin gave him the cup.
"what are you thinking about?"

felix blinked, still looking at the sky.
"I would want to go to Australia. stay with my family for a few days, and say my final goodbyes."