Thinking about a Fiery Mermaid

Chapter 3: Arguments

Chapter 3

Season 3 Episode 18

I hadn't seen Rikki much for a few weeks. When we saw each other, it was awkward – she was clearly avoiding me. She was avoiding me and spending time over on Mako more than ever before. I'd have thought we would have made up properly by now. I kept my façade up. She came into the office.

"Hello stranger," I said cheerily. I was genuinely happy to see her so it wasn't hard to be. "I've hardly seen you around lately,"

"I've been busy," she replied. I didn't believe her. Why would she prefer Mako over me? Was it an excuse to hang out with Will?

"You wouldn't understand." Rikki said in resignation.

"Try me." I said. She looked at me hopefully. A light that had been missing from her eyes returned for that moment. She said she felt like she belonged at Mako Island. Why did I find that amusing? She belonged in the water and on land. Sometimes, I felt like if she were a normal human being things would be much easier. I am an idiot. Why did I laugh? In that moment it seemed so strange. It was as if she was becoming someone or something else. Rikki had just opened up to me and I ridiculed her. She laughed cynically in response.

"For a second there, I actually thought you cared." Why was I constantly causing her to hurt me? When she hurt I hurt. Why could my brain not wrap itself around this fact?

"How could I be so wrong?" she continued. I had noticed that she had become increasingly aloof and her normal fiery temperament was had developed so that she reacted more violently than ever to everything.

"You've changed." I told her. She rolled her eyes and walked off. Why am I constantly putting my foot in it? I chastised myself as I had been doing increasingly lately. My judgement on her change in character wasn't just a judgement based on my own feelings and our relationship going downhill – mainly from my own fault, I admit; I had overheard Cleo and Bella talking in the café about how Rikki had been distancing herself from them also. I hoped I wasn't the cause. More than anything, I wanted her to open up to me. I wanted to show that I loved her. I was much better than some rocky cave and a pool. I know why I didn't. I was afraid; afraid of her reaction, of rejection, of showing I cared. I was a coward hiding behind my ego.

"I know I haven't been around a lot lately, but there's a good reason." Rikki said.

"Yeah, secret mermaid business." I said, sighing.

"I'm serious," she put her hand on my knee. "I could use your help." Rikki was pleading with me. "Please Zane, you're the only one I can ask," What was wrong? Why was I feeling reluctant? Why was I feeling betrayed by how little time she has spent with me? If anything, I was the let-down. Did I believe deep down that our issues were all her fault? I had a meeting with Sophie. I felt a little guilty at keeping our association a secret from Rikki. Why was I hiding that from her? Was it wrong to feel good about her needing me for a change?

I said I couldn't help her. I had an important meeting in a few minutes. I felt like the enemy again as hurt flooded her eyes. Why did I do that? I was rightfully justified wasn't I? If so, why did I feel so bad? She put her head in her hands before getting up, following me out the door reluctantly.

"This is your meeting?"Rikki asked in disbelief.

"I can explain," I began. I knew she would take this the wrong way. I told her I was still sponsoring Will, that it was just business.

"What kind of business?" she asked icily, looking directly at Sophie. Her tone was hostile. I steered her away from Sophie.

"What is your problem?" I asked.