The Delivery Girl

30. Eighteen

Callen

Julie's eyes widen and I immediately regret opening my mouth.

"Did you consider it?" she asks.

"No." The thought of accepting never even crossed my mind. "He was polite about it, told me he understood and knew his proposal was a stretch. Even said that I reminded him of dad."

"Why?" She looks at me like I'm insane. "That's more money than I'll ever see in my life."

"It's not about the money, it never has been." I'll admit that I'm comfortable. I definitely don't need more money. "I just can't leave the company."

She looks at me with a sadness I don't know how to interpret. Concern, maybe. "You seem unhappy sometimes. Do you even enjoy being CEO?"

Her words settle heavily on me. I break eye contact. "It's fine."

Julie leans forward in her seat. "Honesty is really important to me, Callen," she says, her tone gentle but insistent.

I drag my gaze back to her. I gulp as I realize the genuine earnestness in her soft eyes is enough to destroy me. And she doesn't even know it.

"Most of the time I'm fine, but it gets really tough sometimes," I admit reluctantly.

Working late at the office until even the custodial staff have left for the night, taking calls and meetings from home with clients who only meet on weekends, traveling to countless conferences. There's always something that needs my attention. It feels like I have an invisible tether to my job I can never quite break.

There's loneliness too. I'm always maintaining my professionalism and consequently having my staff distancing themselves from me. It's a role that isolates you... a pedestal that feels more like a cage.

Despite it all, I refuse to admit to anyone how utterly exhausted I am. Though I can't help but believe Julie has already seen through the mask.

Julie's brows knit together. "Why did you do it? You said your dad wanted you to take over, but you didn't say he made you do it."

I take a sip of my wine, gathering my thoughts. I'm generally not big on sharing, quite the opposite in fact, but there's something about Julie that makes it less daunting.

"It's complicated. My parents had kids later in life, and I was only ten when my dad had his first heart attack.

Julie's eyebrows raise. "What happened?"

"Many things on his plate, just too much stress for someone his age."

He'd been overworked and stressed for weeks, working on securing some major deal. I remember those days well. Hearing their arguments they had when they thought Eliza and I were asleep. Mom had told me he'd been putting in over eighty hours a week.

"He was well into retirement age by that point. I knew my dad was quite literally going to work himself to his grave if we didn't stop him," I say. "Mom wanted him to just sell the company, but he was too stubborn and kept working."

Julie winces "I can't imagine that went well."

I drag my hand down my face. "He had two more heart attacks later on," I grumble. "It's a miracle that he's still alive."

"Oh jeez," Julie says quietly. "This is where you stepped in, isn't it."

I nod. "I promised him I would take over when I graduated from university, on the condition that he'd take it easy until then."

Fortunately, he did fulfill his end of the deal. He hired two vice presidents and another executive assistant to take some of the workload off himself. He only worked three days a week instead of seven. But the damage was already done, and the responsibility and stress he passed on to me felt heavier than I ever could've imagined.

"That's a major promise to make," Julie says. "How old were you?"

"I was eighteen."

Julie's jaw drops. I'm starting to realize how crazy this all sounds. I was a teenager when I promised to take over a multi-million dollar company. My entire career path was decided, just like that. It felt right at the time, but I quickly became unsure once it all became real. Once it became my life, and not just a hypothetical promise.

"That's insane. You were just a kid," she says quietly. "Did you ever want to change your mind?"

"Honestly, yes. My parents divorced soon after, and my mom wanted me to move to the UK to work at her company after graduating instead."

There were several factors to their divorce, but I'm sure that was the final nail in the coffin. Mom was livid when she found out what I had promised, but I knew I would keep my word.

"So why didn't you?"

"The thought was tempting," I admit, "but I knew my dad was counting on me. Sterling Studios was meant to be our family's legacy."

Julie looks at me thoughtfully before sighing softly. "There's more to life than work, Callen. You're building an empire, but at what cost? Do you ever stop and think about what you're missing?"

I rest my hand over Julie's. "I know," I say quietly. "I wish it were as simple as just quitting, but I'm sure you know how complicated things are behind the scenes."

She nods. "I understand."

"Thanks for listening." It was surprisingly... easy to open up to her. There are very few people in my life who I've told this to.

She gives me a smile that immediately drains my stress away. There's something simply intoxicating about her.

"Thank you for sharing."

–

"You're kidding," Julie says, staring blankly.

"Nope."

She quirks a brow. "Isn't this a bit excessive? It's huge."

I chuckle, rubbing the back of my neck. "I wanted our first official date to be special. Let's go."

"Dinner was fancy enough," she protests.

"Ok I promise you'll get to plan our next date," I say. "Let's just relax and enjoy tonight."

"Alright," she grumbles, but a small giggle slips out.

I take Julie's hand and lead her onto the yacht. It's been ages since I've come here. The yacht has been in the family for as long as I can remember. Family outings, corporate parties, even Eliza's chaotic sweet sixteen. She somehow managed to fit two hundred people here. I was worried the party would end with the ship at the bottom of the ocean.

"Have a seat."

Julie sits on the cushioned seats along the deck. I quickly drape a thick blanket over her shoulders and turn on the fire pit.

"It gets cold out there, especially at night," I explain. "Are you warm enough?"

She nods.

"Ok, I'll be back in a bit," I say, giving her a quick kiss before heading up the small steps to the wheel on the upper deck.

It's been ages since I drove this thing. We used to use it all the time, back when dad was a part of that yacht club. They had boating classes that he enrolled me in when I was young. Muscle memory quickly takes over, and I take us away from the dock, out into the water.

The dim moonlight reflects off the water, creating dancing slivers of white on the surface. It grows peaceful as the noises of the city fade away, replaced by the humming of the engine and splashes of water.

I continue out until the city skyline fades into small, twinkling dots behind us. Out here, alone with the stars and open water is an unfamiliar sense of calmness. I stop the engine and head back down to the lower deck.

Julie is turned around, looking out at the view over the ledge. Her dress ripples in the wind, her hair catching the moonlight. Mismatched feelings run through me as I realize everything about her is beautiful to me.

And the thought of losing her terrifies me.

-----

A/N:

Meanwhile when I was 18 I had 0 clue what I was doing in life 😭😭