The Delivery Girl

39. Afraid

Callen

"About what?" The list of things that could be worrying Julie is miles long. And I thought my life was stressful.

She lets out a soft breath and looks down at her lap. "That I'm competing with Sterling Studios for your attention... and I've already lost before the competition even started."

I feel my stomach sink. I knew it was only so long before this came up. Multiple girlfriends in the past have brought up this same concern – that I care more about work than them. That was when I would end the relationship, besides a select few that kept going. Those were the ones that ended up hurting both of us more in the end.

This time, however, the urge to call it quits is barely a consideration. There's something about Julie that makes her worth fighting for.

I gently cup her cheek. "Julie, I promise you're incredibly important to me."

The guilt immediately comes as a crushing weight on my chest when I realize I can't bring myself to say that she's my number one priority. These days, even I'm not sure what my number one priority is.

Staying alive, I suppose.

How long until I have a heart attack, just like dad?

I continue when she doesn't speak, "I know I don't have the best work life balance, but I want to make time for you."

Her eyes briefly flicker up at me. "I appreciate that you want to... but I'm scared. I really like you, and I'm still afraid I'm setting myself up for inevitable heartbreak in the end."

I realize there aren't many things I can offer her for reassurance. Not right now, at least, before I've figured things out. "Ok, let's have a special date on Friday. I'll arrange everything."

Her worried frown doesn't shift. "You don't have to do that."

"Actions speak louder than words," I say. "Please let me show you how important you are to me. I'll leave work early so we can have the whole evening together."

She gives me a weak smile.

"Ok."

–

"Mom, did you hear the great news?" Eliza gives us an impish grin.

"Eliza," I groan, tempted to kick her out of the call. I can't help but appreciate how much easier it is to avoid people online. "Aren't we here to plan the Christmas dinner?" The time zone difference and mom's tight schedule meant we started our call at nearly midnight. Julie is already fast asleep upstairs.

Mom looks at us curiously. "Go on."

"Callen has a girlfriend!" she says gleefully.

Mom gasps and holds her cheeks in her hands. "Finally! Who is she? How did you meet? When do I get to meet her?"

"Mother." I sigh and look up at the ceiling. This is somehow worse than being interrogated for being single. "She's nice... that's all you need to know."

To my dismay, my family has always loved embarrassing me in front of my girlfriends. I'm certainly in no rush to formally introduce them to Julie.

"I've met her," Eliza says. "Weird coincidence, but I ran into her this morning at a cafe."

I raise an eyebrow. "You what?"

Eliza ignores me and continues. "I think you would like her, Mom," she says with a soft smile. "She's really smart and kind... pretty too."