Behind Brown Eyes (Phan)

Chapter 2

I was trying so hard not to smile as I walked to school. I mentally prepared myself for the awful name callings and walked through the front doors but noticed the guys weren't around. My first immediate thought was that they're going to pop out and scare the shit out of me, then beat me up. Which is something they would do. 

I kept low and rounded the corner to get to my locker but I still had no idea where they were, so I took it as a free pass to get my shit and book it to class. A free pass that applies for No Getting Beat Up Today, which actually made me scared because they usually wouldn't do something like this, and if they would it would be something far worse. Like a surprise attack. 

I made it to class with my books scratch free and sat in my seat at the very back of the class. I like sitting here because the teacher don't see or call on me. 

The bell rang as the teacher walked in and the guys still weren't around. My nerves piled up and I started sweating. This is bad, this is going to be bad.

-

The lesson went by rather slow, which made me a little happy. That slow lesson was rather amazing not having the guys there but knowing that they're around some where kept my nerves around. 

It was lunch now and I made my way to my locker along with the sea of people trying to get to theirs. My locker was unlocked and there were notes coming out from the side. I looked around first to make sure the guys weren't hiding somewhere before I opened it. There were about 10 letters or more with long scripts on them and I know that I didn't want to read them, not here, not now, and not with the guys around somewhere. I shoved them into my backpack and slammed my locker shut. 

I wasn't going to eat today, so I made my way to the Field. My thinking place. 

-

I like coming to the Field, it's behind the school, pretty far behind the school, behind the football field and the track. There are weeds and a fence after the track and the Field is behind there, a few hundred feet behind there. I like going there. No one has an idea it's here, it's super quiet, I can think and be myself here. Even though I am by myself, I will talk, and talk and talk... to no one in particular. 

The Feild. 

I threw my backpack on the ground, knowing I was safe out here and laid down on the grass under the trees. I reminded myself that he had followed my twitter and said he wanted to talk to me and I started laughing. I laughed and couldn't stop laughing. He wants to talk to me, I thought. And that thought made me happy.