Hot Rush

chapter 50

chapter 50 guys its a bit of a sandwich filler

'Shifting can be difficult if your not focused.' Blaise stated his voice monotonous. 'sometimes the need to shift is almost uncontrolabale in intense situations or when your emotions are overwhelming, such as hurt or anger' Rosa could hear the drone of his voice but she wasnt listening, her gaze unfocused as she sat blankly staring out at the rainforest below her. 'are you even listening' he growled and she didn’t even flinch at his tone, looking at him over her shoulder she stated 'no' her voice empty and dead, she saw pain flash in his eyes but it didn’t affect her. She felt cold, his betrayal towards her raw and burning. It was midday, the air unusally cool, it had been nearly three days since the others left. Three days filled with so much she could barely comprehend. 'Rosa you need to know these things if you plan on shifting' he snapped but she wasnt phased. 'im not about to listen to anything you have to say Blaise, so drop the act.'' she responded turning back around to look out of the balcony. 'you have to listen, turn around now' he growled but she didnt move, didn’t even blink. 'I said turn around now' he growled again. Within a heart beat Blaise was infornt of her his face inches from her, his eyes fiery and burning with anger. 'listen to me' he grolwed but she didn’t even bat an eyelid, her eyes glassy as she stared through him like he wasnt there. 'look at me dammit, talk to me' he growled exasperation leaking through his anger. Her eyes focused on him but only for a second, not even a flicker of recognition in them as she slowly stood up, pushing past him without a word she turned her back on him, her heart frozen to that pained desperate plea in his eyes.

Blaise felt his heart break as he watched her shaky body shuffle back towards her bedroom, that dead look in her eyes had almost crippled him, not even a flicker fo emotion as if he had killed something inside her, she was a shell, and it hurt so much becuase he knew he was the reason. 'Rosa please' he pleaded. Nothing could hurt him like she could. He couldnt imagine how she must be feeling, but he wanted to be there for her, help her through this, he needed to be that person she relied on. She was so closed off right now, he didn’t know how to break back in to her, let her know what he did was for her own good, he had only her best intrest at heart. He was trying to protect her but he knew that wouldnt go down well, he had seen Rosa angry, she didn’t need protection but he couldnt help it, the aggressiveness and possesiveness it was all part and parcel of being a shifter. He hoped she'd realise that soon. Her steady breathing soothed him, silently as ever he padded over to her bedroom, crossing his arms he leaned againnst the door frame, just watching her in her bed. She looked so peaceful, like an angel as if she hadnt experienced the things she had, nothing like the empty shell from before. Sighing he actually regretted not telling her sooner he felt like he was being crushed, as if he were drowning and their wasnt enough air, hurting Rosa caused him physical pain and he hated it, knowing what she was feeling was much worse. She was getting to him, messing with his head, all she had to do was say a word and it would be hers, he would make sure of it, he hated the power she had over him, so muchso  he would lay down his life for her within a heart beat and do it over and over if she asked. But he couldnt even hate himself for it because she made it worth it. He had never spent so much time in the prescense of a woman she unnerved him, did things to his body that made it impossible to sleep at night, she was fire and ice in one and he loved the rollercoaster ride that was their relationship. By now he was beside her, looking down at her angels face, her lips parted slightly as she breathed, her eyelashes like two dark crescents resting aginst her skin, she was beautiful and his heart ached at the sight of her, she was here, yet she wasnt his.Leaning down he brushed a feather light kiss against her forhead, stiffening when he heard her heart skip, when her steady breathing continued he breathed a sigh, her subocnious could feel him, her leapord could feel him more like, and it made a part of him heal to know that her leapord was aware of him and found comfort in him. Inhaling her delicous scent, he reluctantly pulled away, her barley audible whimper had him looking back to her sleeping form, his heart picking up at the fact that she was missing his touch even in her sleep, no matter how she acted her subconcious wouldnt lie. This made him feel better he still had a shot and he wasnt about ot waste it. Dropping his hand from her hair he stepped away breathing deeply he left her bedroom and the house all together. Shifting mid stride he didn’t care if he had just torn the last pair of jeans he owned. He needed to run, to let up how angry he was at himself at everything, to tear up trees when he remembered the way Rosa looked at him, that empty dead look that made him feel 2inches tall, she looked at him like he was nothing, and that hurt more then anything else could, he could take anger and hurt but that cold emptiness was beyond him, she had frozen him out and it made him so angry. Snarling he ran full tilt pushing his body, his thick muscles easily coping with the new pace, effortlessley he bounded over branches and through vegetation, the rainforst falling silent around him, the animals weary of the angry wild cat beneath them, keeping queit so as not to attract attention. It felt like hours since he had left the house, not once did he stop running, he wasnt stupid he was running in a circle never straying to far from Rosa's home, he just needed to work of his anger. Passing by the home again a distinct whimper had him snarling, his whole boy tense as his ears twitched locating any other sound, his nose trying to pick up a threatning scent. There was none. His heart lurched, how could he have left her up there on her own. His graceful, stealthy body quickly scoured the perimeter of her tree, there was no sign of any one else, but that didn’t mean there wasnt anyone here, Growling low a red mist settled over him at the idea that Rosa could be in danger, his large claws dug in to the thick bark of the tree and he easily climbed up, jumping from branch to branch he made quick work of getting to the top. Just as he reached the pathway leading to her home another whimper had him snarling, his pace twice as fast, his jaguar wanting to charge in and kill what was upsetting her, but his rational side was forcing him to shift back, being jagur around Rosa this angry was a bad idea, that was the only way he would change back, when there was danger to her. Growling once again Blaise shifted mid stride, his lean body contorting midair as he landed back to the tree with a slight thud. His feet easily able to balance he broke out in to a sprint his body sweaty and heaving with the running. His face was a mask of determination, his eyes narrowed to slits as he prepared to destroy the threat to Rosa. Another whimper had him cursing and in the next second he smashed in to her wooden door. Pieces of wood and splinters falling in all directions as he charged in to her bedroom his heart in his throat but as he tunred the corner he froze. The sight was incredible. There she was, his woman safe and sound in her bed. Except she wasnt all that sound, her eyes were wide open, full of tears and her face puffy from crying, her body was positioned half of the bed her legs over the side looking like she was ready to stand up. She was wearing a tank yop and panties and he had no idea when she had put them on because he clearly remembered leaving her naked. Blaise just stood there staring at the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, his heart rate slowly settling knowing she was safe, but the pain he felt at seeing her so broken tore at him. 'sorry' he mumbled dropping his gaze,he had never felt so small in his entire life. She hated him and there was no way he was going to stay and listen to her cry about his betrayal. Abruptly turning he began walking out. 'where are you going' he heard her whisper, her voice hoarse and husky. He closed his eyes and savoured the fact that she was talking to him, without turning he replied 'out'. Why was she asking he wondered still rooted to the spot hoping she'd day something else in her angels voice. 'dont-go' she chocked and he spun to see her looking so fragile, her lip quivering and her eyes filed with unshed tears, his heart clenched painfully at the sight. 'why would you want me to stay' he replied truly perplexed. Her eyes dropped and he saw a tear roll down her cheek wanting nothing more then to kiss it away, each tear was like a knife to his heart. 'I thought you'd gone' she whsipered and he closed his eyes at her words, she didn’t trust him not one bit. Even after he'd said he wouldnt leave, he guessed this whole betrayal thing changed everything.