The End

Chapter 38: Relief and Restraint

Patrick sat in his hotel room at the Westin near the Anaheim convention center. Jillian putting the final touches on his icy blonde hair.  He fiddled with his phone, desperately trying to resist the urge to text her. 

It was utter torture knowing that Ellen was attending this event alone and that he would still have Jillian on his arm. The fact that he couldn't even text her to find out when she was arriving furthered his pain. 

It had been nearly 3 weeks since he'd seen her. His meeting with Charlotte Goldwyn had raised the stakes. They were nearing the end of this chapter of their lives. And now, she was all he could think about. He wondered if she was just a few rooms away. The anticipation of running into her almost too much for him to handle. 

Disney spared no expense for this event. He was surrounded by celebrities and prominent Disney figures. The details perfectly executed, from the lighting to the food, to the music. Patrick's chest ached. He watched as the greeting team graciously took Jillian's coat. For a moment a tinge of guilt fluttered through him. She was still the woman he chose to marry, the mother of his children. He watched the way she moved, she'd never fully settled into this life. The red carpets, the photoshoots, the spotlight.

He wished life wasn't so complex. Perhaps there was a universe where he owned a bike repair shop in Maine and she was a hairstylist. He wondered if he would have been happy there. He thought maybe he would, as long as he didn't step foot in Boston. Because part of him also knew, he'd find Ellen in any life.

Patrick had made his way through multiple interviews, charismatic, controlled composed.  Though his mind raced with uncertainty. With each passing moment he was attempting to calculate the seconds. Preparing himself for both relief and restraint. He'd rehearsed the give and take. They would connect enough to feed the machine that made them, but not too much as to draw attention to their spark. 

He was halfway through yet another interview when a giggle caught his attention. It sent his nerves spiraling. Patrick glanced to start of the interview line. "I'm sorry," her voice childlike but sincere, "I'm gonna cut the line. I promise I'll come back."

His stance started to shift. He tried to regain his focus on his interview but all was lost. Patrick glanced back toward her. She was making her apologies as she cut past multiple news outlets. He rubbed his lips together nervously. His eyes fighting to stay focused on the man interviewing him. 

Patrick had lost all control. She was so close he was sure he could smell her perfume. He glanced in her direction again. This time making eye contact. The way his eyebrows flicked up in excitement showing his cards a little too much.  

She burst into his interview like a bubbling breath of fresh air. "Enchanted 2," she said happily.  Her voice was almost giddy to see him. He wasn't sure if she was over compensating to hid their current relationship or if these weeks had felt equally as long to her. 

He pulled her into his arms. Unable to resist kissing her cheek, "How are you?"

"I'm good, how are you?" she parted from his hug but intertwined her fingers in his at their side. Their gaze lingering just a little too long. A rush of nervousness hit, "I love the hair. It's so good," she gushed as if she hadn't yet seen it in person. Patrick watched as Ellen struggled to keep her body still. He turned his back from the camera only to have eyes on her. 

"Thank you so much," he answered nearly laughing at her.

"Are we going to Enchanted 2," she asked.

"Are you coming to visit at the premiere." 

"Of course I will," she shot back. Their words fighting to keep up with the intentions they had set for running into each other here. A plan that felt like it was quickly failing 

"You look fantastic," he said his smile pulling so hard at his lips. 

"Thank you so much so do you," their hands still intertwined even as she moved about.

"I've got the question..." she began but he cut her off.

"How's it feel to be a legend?" he attempted to ground them. 

She laughed, "we were already leg-,"

Patrick suddenly thought of a way to land this thing. He grabbed the microphone from the host. She leaned into the moment nearly wrapping her arms around him as he faced the camera. Her eyes met Jillian's and she distanced herself to a more casual friend stance. 

He took off into playful mode. Interviewing her there as if he were the host.  Somewhere between holding her hand and looking into her eyes and letting her laugh seep into his skin like a drug, he forgot. He forgot that he was supposed to be holding back. 

When the interview ended Ellen quickened her pace to go back to the beginning of the line. He lingered behind her. She stood waiting for her turn just around the red carpet backdrop. For a fleeting moment, they were out of site of photographers, and news outlets. Jillian had been caught up in a conversation. The world around them was focused elsewhere. 

Patrick breathed a sigh of relief, in the shadow of the backdrop, he let his guard down. Patrick snaked his arm around her waisted and pulled her closer. A nervous giggle escaped her. The high of his touch mixing with the fear of being caught. But her eyes rested over his, her soul immediately catching fire. His eyes fell to her lips. He leaned in so close she was sure he was going to kiss her. "Am I interrupting," Jillian's voice harsh.

"Jill," Ellen's voice desperately tried to stay steady. She hugged her warmly. Far more warmly than the other woman should hug the wife. " You look great. Excited to try whatever you have in the swag bags. Nice to see you," she said as she was quickly passing through to her interviews. And then it hit her, she shouldn't know about the swag bags. She turned back to study Jill's reaction. It seemed to pass unnoticed. Jill was too consumed by the guilty, cat-that-ate-the-canary look on Patrick's face.