The End

Chapter 13: Until Now

Patrick remembered those six months very clearly. The Nostalgia was eating him alive. Perhaps more difficult than losing her entirely, was experiencing her from a distance. She was close enough to see, admire, he could reach out and touch her. Pull her in for a kiss. But life was different now. She wasn't his to love. In some ways she had never been. His mind couldn't help but replay all the ways she had been. God, he missed those days. He missed knowing she wasn't far behind when he left a room. He missed her quick touches and intentional glances. The feeling of her eyes on him across the room. Stolen moments. It wasn't the physical reconnection that Patrick remembered so vividly about Seattle, it was the emotional one.

It was standing across from her in that candle lit field. Her eyes twinkled. The wound of their separation burned more than usual. He wanted to shout Meredith's words back at her. 'Extraordinary together or Ordinary apart.' But he didn't.

The memory burned now just as much as it did in that moment. He missed that Patrick. He didn't know what he had back then. The years in front of him, still with her by his side.

The thought of her hand settling against his forearm still sending a wave of emotion through his body. He would never understand how the simplest interaction drove him insanely crazy.

Patrick felt as though his heart hung in the balance as he awaited her response. How he had gone from indifferently appreciating her return to anxiously hanging on every message, he wasn't sure. He supposed that was just the hand they were dealt. The way their relationship would always end up.

"Those late wrap times did always get us in trouble." He watched her words appear on his screen. Her response felt strangely distanced.

"Yeah," Patrick swallowed a tinge of embarrassment and responded quickly.

"I never can stay away from you for long." Her next response took him by surprise. His embarrassment growing increasingly unnecessary.

"That was the longest." Patrick responded still feeling the ache from that season of their lives and then simultaneously,

"Well, until now."

"Well, until now." Ellen's words seemed to echo her voice.

"Jinx," he smiled. "I'm glad it's over."

"Is it over?" she asked, always challenging him.

"Isn't it?" he gave her a taste of her own medicine. Patrick knew it was too soon to be seeing her. He knew that giving in this quickly was a recipe for disaster, especially in light of the state of the world but his impulses were a slave to her. "I'll be at point dume around 4." Left his fingers before he could second guess, "I usually take an afternoon drive, but I need a little fresh air today."

"Is that an invitation?"

"I shouldn't be inviting you anywhere. But if you happened to be there..."

"If I happened to be there... you wouldn't ignore me."

"That would be rude. An old friend like you..."

"Who you calling old, Dempsey?" He laughed out loud.

Patrick looked up as a soccer ball bounced its way down the stairs. He shook his head. "Dad?" Darby appeared shortly after it on the edge of the living room. "Can we get pizza tonight?"

Patrick shrugged, "Sure buddy. I'll pick up D'amores."

"Awesome," He smiled and went to find his brother. "Sully!" Despite every ounce of their privilege to a teenage boy, there was still something exciting about pizza for dinner.

There wasn't much time before Patrick would have to return home with dinner for his family. His Porsche hummed to a stop and he stepped out of his car and onto the soft sand. The sun was low in the sky and the air growing a little cold.