The Braxton girl

See you on the other side

It's been about 2 weeks since I've moved back in with Ricky and the boys. It's obviously very different without Brax. I know that we get to see him but it still feels like we are mourning him as he is basically gone from our lives. Everything else is good though. Everyone doing ok.

Today, everyone is coming over for dinner so I decided to make cupcakes for dessert while they are all out and Ricky's asleep. I grab the flour,sugar and everything else I need. I start to mix them together then I bend over and put them in the oven. As soon as I bent over I felt an excruciating pain in by stomach. This isn't normal during I pregnancy. I drop to the floor in agony. "Ricky!!! Ricky!!!!" Just as I'm calling For Ricky, Josh walks in with Evie. "Josh help me!!!!! My stomach it's hurting so much. I'm afraid it's to do with the baby" "oh god ok, I'll call an ambulance" "no that will take too long, bring me in your car. Evie get Ricky from next door and call Vj and Kyle" "ok, we'll follow you up" Josh walks over and carries me to his car. He then drives off as fast as he can.

When we arrive in the hospital, we see Nate straight away. "Nate!!!! I think there is something wrong with the baby. It hurts so much. " "ok Josh, bring her in here and put her on the bed"

Within about ten minutes, Nate has run so many tests. "Becky, I'm so sorry your baby's died" "make the pain go away!!!!" "You are going to have to give birth to her. We'll start when your ready," "just start already" "ok really hard pushes Becky, good, just a little more, and we have her. Is the pain gone ?" "Yeh" "I know this will be really hard but do you want to hold your baby?" "Yes please. Is she really dead? " "yes Becky, I'm so sorry" "but how?" "Your body wasn't strong enough to cope with the baby. That was effected by your previous cancer illness" "will I ever be able to have a baby?" "We will test you in a few years but just not yet. Here, I'll let you hold your baby. We'll give you sometime alone and then we will be back in." He places my baby in my arms and I break down in tears.

"I'm so sorry that I couldn't support you princess. Oh my god, you are so beautiful. All I had to do was last another month, but I couldn't do it. I'm so sorry. It's amazing to be able to see you. Your little hands and feet and face but it breaks me when I put my hand on your chest and there is no heart beat. I was going to give you the best life. You were going to have an amazing family. I'm so sorry"

I look up and see Vj standing at the doorway. "She's gone Vj. My little princess is dead." "Sssshhh, is going to be ok" he sits on the bed and wraps his arm around me. "I love you so much Vj. No matter what I say in the next little while, please don't leave me" "I promise I'm not going anywhere"

I stayed in the hospital over night because they needed to keep an eye on me. This morning Vj brought me home and brought me to bed . I've barely spoken since yesterday. It just seems like everything around me comes crashing down. I just killed my baby, Casey's dead, Sean's dead, and Brax is in jail. I can't handle it anymore.

"Princess, do you want me to get you something to eat" I shake my head. "Ok. Well I'll be in the living room with Kyle, Ricky and Josh if you want anything" I hear the door shut and jump out of bed. I open the window and climb out. Where will nobody find me? I grab a pen and write on the wall, 'I love you all". I then walk out the garden . I spot Kat at the edge of the caravan park . I see all her police gear on the table beside her. I pick up a rock and throw it at one of the caravan windows then hide. Kat runs straight to the window. As soon as she's gone, I make my move and grab the handcuffs off the table and continue to the pier.

When I get to the pier I put the handcuffs on my wrists behind my back and move to the edge of the pier. I hear my name being called by many people from a distance. It's now or never. Doing this will be better for everyone. I don't deserve to be alive. "I'm on my way Case, Amelia. See you on the other side." With that.... I jump.