A/n: I haven't ever been drunk.
Phil-
I walk down the long alleyways in the backstreets of London. The smell of wet pavement, beer and smoke. I keep on walking down the alley until I find a small pub hidden away from view. I enter the pub and sit on one of the stools facing the bartender.
"What ya want?"
"Just get me a beer." I say.
I need something to take my mind off everything. Right now everything is just running through my head and I'm getting sick of the thoughts. Unlike most people I am not the one to go for drugs, I couldn't do that.
"Rough night?" The bartender says passing me my beer.
"Rough year." I reply.
There is no one else in the place so he rests his arms on the table and looks me in the eye.
"Talk to me."
"I have fallen into a depression." I mumble necking my beer.
"Why, work?"
"Sort of. Another one please." I say slamming a 5 pound note on the table.
"What you mean sort of?" He says passing me another one.
"Well this is whats going on..." I start.
I tell him whats going on with everything, how I feel about my life to my deepest secret, my love for Dan. As I do this I slowly get intoxicated. I drink so much that I can hardly walk.
"Mate another one please."
"Look man, I'm sorry but I'm going to have to cut you off."
"What You- you you can't do that."
The room starts to spin.
"Mate I'm sorry but you can't drink anymore, you will pass out."
"I DON'T CARE! I WANT TO DIE OK?" I yell.
"Mate-"
"Just please let me die." I whisper.
At this moment the door bursts open and a tall brown haired man enters the room.
"PHILIP MICHAEL LESTER." He yells grabbing my wrist.
"Get- get off me you dick." I slur.
"Phil it's me, Dan." He says angrily.
I raise my fist to hit him but he lifts his hand up and grabs it.
"We. Are. Going. Home. Now." He says darkly.
"No!" I spit.
"Thats it." He says throwing me over his shoulder.
"PUT ME DOWN!" I scream slamming my fists on his back.
"I'm sorry for any problems sir." He says to the bartender.
"May I ask who you are?" He asks.
"I'm his roommate, Dan." Dan says.
*Next morning*
"Phil I- I- I can't believe you." He says with his face in his hands.
"I'm sorry. I- I always stuff up." I say running into the bathroom.
I'm going to make sure I never stuff up again.
A/n: Cliff hanger haha.
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If I die
FanfictionNot understanding feelings for others is hard. Not understanding attraction is hard. But it's even harder when you don't understand yourself. Trust is hard when you can't trust yourself.