Somewhere Only We Know

XLIV - Unsend

5:29 a.m., Sunday

"No, that's not it." Kai disagreed, slapping my hand away from my phone. He's done that about five times now. And honestly? I take offense to it. I wouldn't say I'm a great writer or anything, but I think my work is satisfactory. Except that what I was attempting to compose wasn't a graded paper or anything. Just a text message to tell my family that I want to leave them and live far, far away, and potentially take a year off before going to college.

"What the fuck do I say then? You type," I said, frowning as I groaned into my pillow. 

He laughed between his words, scratching his neck. "You sure? I sound nothing like you; this'll seem obviously unnatural."

Quickly, I sat up, facing him with furrowed brows and a frown that stuck. "Whatever, dude! It won't matter anyway since they'll each find their own special way to make it about them."

He glanced at me with a small frown, almost like he was pitiful. I shook my head and rolled my eyes. "I'm kidding. Just say whatever you would say to your family if you told them you want to take a gap year."

"Well, first of all, I don't tell my family anything. Other than my dad, everyone thinks I'm in New York," he responded, looking back at my phone.

"Dude, just type."

And like that, he began typing.

I watched as he tapped on my screen, taking quick peeks but eventually giving up after he kept pulling away.

It might be confusing—what our relationship is now, but we never really talked about it. I've tried bringing it up, but there was always something going on. To be honest, I'm not even certain that he actually confessed to me. It could've been a dream. Who knows?

I lost my patience after two minutes and grabbed my phone back.

"'I think it's time to tell you all about the real me'? Are you kidding?" I glanced at him, watching him shrug his shoulders before handing the phone back. "This is terrible."

His arms flew up as he stretched. "Well, good luck with that. I gotta go before they notice I've been gone."

"You've been here since the after party; I'm sure they've noticed by now," I said as I typed, still looking at my phone.

"You need a nap, dude." Kai pointed at me with a finger before heading toward the door. He paused, glancing back with a half-smile. "Seriously. You're gonna pass out mid-sentence if you don't sleep."

"Yeah, yeah, get out," I muttered, not even looking up from my screen.

The door clicked shut behind him, and I went back to typing, only half-focused on what I was writing.

I leaned against my headboard, placing my phone on my bed.

What do I even say? How do I even say it?—'Hey family, I wanna take a gap year; it's a non-negotiable, by the way.'

Maybe I should just do what Kai does: not tell anyone about my plans. I don't necessarily need financial support from them since I've saved up over the years, and if my funds aren't enough, I can always sell my car, since New York apartments rarely have parking spaces. Other than that, I want to work and gain some experience before diving into the real world.

Before I could continue to spiral, several knocks crashed against my door, making me jump internally.

"What on earth?" I said to myself as I walked into my living room.