FTRS One-Shots

jaxk again but its sad

a/n: just so u guys know, this chapter is not me condoning kissing someone who has a partner, its just for plot, please do not kiss someone who has a partner that's a bad idea!!

also guys how would we feel about jax breaking up w gilly sometime in the future and gilly being like "yea lwk devin's fine i want her" and jax is like "oh cool i want jack" and them just like going on w their day

doesn't happen in this one-shot but it could if u want lol

also guys is the mermaid lady's name madame cleo i lwk forget and im too tired to search it up or check the books

"Jax and Jack, please partner together!"

Jack's eyes lit up for just a moment. He made sure to hold it back. He couldn't let anyone see that, not when Jax's disgust was so clear on his face.

"Ready, Prince?" Jack grinned, hands resting on Jax's shoulder and waist. Calm. Collected. Just a little teasing to make Jax annoyed, because that's what sort-of-friends do.

"Shut up," Jax rolled his eyes. The music started. Jax was stiff, obviously not wanting to be in this position.

Jack couldn't agree. He wished, god, he wished he could. This feeling, the want, the deep attraction that had settled in his heart the moment he saw blonde hair and violet eyes, hurt harder than the worst wound.

Because every time Jax looked at her, Jack felt something and everything and nothing all at once. Grief and anger and betrayal and loss and confusion and pain. Pain because Jax didn't love him. Pain because he loved someone else. Pain because there was no universe in which the villain lived happily ever after.

Jack was the villain, after all. The traitor. The crook. The farm boy that came to the rescue, only to fuck it all up when it mattered the most. He wouldn't get a happy ending. He'd been cursed from the start. By her.

Jack wanted to blame her. Wanted to pour all his sorrow into anger strong enough to bury her under.

But he couldn't. How could he? She wasn't the one in the wrong. He was.

He felt so stupid, dancing with the one person he wanted most, yet couldn't have. All while that person's eyes were on someone else.

Jack stepped on Jax's feet.

He wasn't quite sure why. Maybe he just wanted attention, as pathetic as that sounded. He just wanted Jax to see him. Why didn't Jax ever see him?

"Ow!" Jax yelped, scowling deeply. "Why'd you do that?"

"Accident," Jack shrugged, making sure the look on his face said otherwise. Jax scowled deeper. Jack idly thought that his face would be stuck like that permanently if he kept scowling so intensely.

"Why do you do that?" Jax snapped. "You always do stuff to annoy me. Why do you hate me so much?"

This stupid, oblivious, prince. Jack was suddenly so very mad. Pissed off at himself and Jax and Gilly and Madame Cleo and everyone and everything.

For once, he just wanted to have someone without facing consequences. He was going to either punch Jax or kiss him.

Jack's stomach was in knots as he spat, "You're royal. You get all the shit you want for free. You don't have to work for a thing, Jax. You have no clue what loss is. You don't know anything but your gold fucking throne-"

"Shut the fuck up!" Jax's voice rose. "You don't know what you're talking about! You think you're the only person in the world who has problems? Get your head out of your ass, Jack! My dad doesn't bother to ask me how I'm doing, my sister was missing for years, and lord knows what my mom's doing with her life. You don't know anything!"

"Boys!" Madame Cleo shrieked. "To Headmistress Flora's office, now!"

Jack's chest was squeezing tight as he walked out of the doors along with Jax. He felt dizzy, and his heart was pounding in his ears. He was faintly aware that he was having a panic attack. He didn't care. He couldn't. Not when he could feel his vision getting blurry with tears.

"Holy crap, are you crying over getting sent to the office?" Jax scoffed. "It's not that deep. Just- woah, shit, are you okay?"

Jack didn't know what was happening, but his back was against the wall and he was sitting on the floor. He squeezing his eyes shut and pulled his knees up to his chest, and through all the tears and pain and overwhelm, he was embarrassed. Ashamed.

He hadn't had a panic attack in a long time.  He used to have them when he was younger, during and after the war. But he wasn't a child anymore. He was 17. And he was having an attack in front of Jax. 

Jax, who was sitting in front of him and telling him to breathe. Jax, whose hands were cupping his face. Jax, who looked so, so worried for the person who had just shouted at him for being something he can't control.

He tried to say he was sorry, that Jax could go if he wanted, that he didn't have to stay, but all that came out were sobs.

"Just breathe, Jack," Jax whispered. "It's okay. Just... copy what I do, okay?"

Jack managed a nod, watching through teary eyes as Jax took a big, exaggerated breath in, held it, then let it out. Jack copied, till the ragged, fast paced breaths turned a little slower, and he could feel oxygen entering his lungs.

"Are you- are you okay?" Jax asked, still looking worried. "Sometimes Gilly has panic attacks, and this is what I usually-"

He was still talking about Gilly. Everything came back to Gilly. Jack was so, so sick of that name, and Jax was still talking, and Jack grabbed Jax's face and pressed their lips together.

Jack didn't kiss him for long. Just a couple of seconds, and then he pulled back, and the confusion and pain in Jax's eyes matched Jack's.

What had he just done?

He was pretty sure he whispered, "Please go." But who knew? Jack watched as Jax slowly walked away. Jack hid his face in his hands. 

He'd done it again. Ruined everything.

WORD COUNT: 1000