Y/N groaned at the sounds of moaning that travelled through the thin walls of the apartment. While this was typical and she had gotten used to it, it didn't mean that she wasn't annoyed by it.
Luke and Y/N had been roommates for almost two years now and she had learned to deal with the fact that Luke liked to have sex. Ever since he had broken up with his long term girlfriend a year ago, he had been steadily hooking up with a few girls, depending on who in his contacts were available. Why he didn't bother trying to find a new relationship was beyond her, considering he was a great lover.
With a sigh, she set down her things and relaxed into the couch in their small living room. If she were to hide herself away in her bedroom, the sounds of the moaning would only be louder, so she opted for drowning it out with the sounds of late night television.
Draping a blanket over her lap, Y/N began flipping through channels, searching for the best option. She decided to go with Jimmy Fallon because she low-key had a crush on him and settled in, training her mind on the sounds coming from the TV rather than the ones coming from Luke's bedroom. During a commercial break, she popped open the bottle of wine she purchased last week and poured herself a glass, carrying the bottle to the living room with her. If it came down to it, she would get drunk so she would just forget about it all.
While her eyes were focused on the television, Y/N's mind wandered deep into thought, thinking about how much she hated herself for turning the platonic relationship between her and Luke into something more by developing feelings for him somewhere along the way. She would rather die than have Luke figure it out, considering it would make things in their apartment awkward. Either way, her feelings for him were still there and she couldn't help the pang in her heart whenever she could actually hear him fucking a girl. He didn't even have the decency to warn her so she wouldn't have to sit through it all. Instead, she'd have to wait till they were finished before she could be at peace, and through it all, she'd have to sit on the jealousy bubbling inside her.
By the time Jimmy Fallon was saying his thank you's and goodnights, Luke's bedroom door opened and Y/N had downed half the bottle of wine in one sitting. While that didn't seem like much, Y/N was a lightweight because she rarely drank, so it was certainly enough to have her mind swimming.
"Thanks for the warning, roomie," she said, turning to see a half-naked Luke with a girl that she knew way too well. "Fantastic! You've gone and fucked Jade. Did you really have to go and fuck my best friend?"
When neither one of them would meet her eyes or even say a thing, Y/N let out a sigh of frustration, picking up the half-empty bottle of wine from the coffee table. She pushed past the two shameful looking people that she was supposed to call her friends. Before she could reach her bedroom door, a hand grabbed her wrist, making her look back for a moment. Jade looked at her with pleading eyes, which only made Y/N angrier.
"Can we at least talk about this?" She asked.
"Talk about what, Jade? I fucking trusted you and you completely disregarded that. What is there left to talk about? I really don't want to hear some bullshit excuse from you right now," Y/N raged, briefly looking at Luke, who stared down at the floor.
"At least let me explain," Jade begged.
"Get your hand off of me before a break it," Y/N said as calmly as she could. A fire raged in her eyes and Jade got the message, letting her grip fall from Y/N's arm.
With a slam of the door, Y/N slid against the cold wood and took a big gulp from the bottle of red wine.
At the moment, her anger was rooted in two places. In the fact that she had this ridiculous crush on her roommate, and the fact that her best friend had broken a promise they had made in the early days after Luke had become newly single.
Jade was completely aware of Y/N's growing crush on Luke and she always gushed about how cute the two of them would be together. She only felt betrayed from the fact that Jade went back on her promise of staying away from Luke. How the two had managed to get together was still a mystery to her.
When her butt started to ache from sitting on the hardwood floor, Y/N pulled herself off the ground and made her way over to her bed where she could bury herself in her covers.
Taking another long swig from the bottle, Y/N set the bottle down on her nightstand and just laid on the bed, her feet dangling off the edge. In the silence, she could hear Luke bidding Jade goodbye and it almost made her want to throw up all the alcohol in her system at the moment.
When it grew completely silent again, all that Y/N could hear was the increased rate of her heart. Her body grew very warm, as it always did when she drank alcohol, and she couldn't find the willpower to make herself into a burrito with her blankets because that would only cause her to sweat.
So, she laid there on top of all of her blankets, just staring at the plain, white ceiling, wishing they would just give her answers on how to move on from this situation. Her hand reached for the bottle resting next to her bed and she sat up on her elbows, taking in another hefty amount.
Y/N's mind went back to the sight of Luke shirtless and tears brimmed her eyes because that is the last thing she wanted to think about. All she wanted to do was run her hands down his chest and rest her fingers in his golden hair and the fact that she had never done that, while her best friend had, seemed unfair to her.
Anger still bubbled within her as she thought about how Luke had decided to get with her best friend. She was the only female in Y/N's life and Luke had managed to taint that by leaving his fingerprints on her skin. Just thinking about it made her want to scream at the top of her lungs, but since she didn't have the energy for that, she took one more drink from the bottle and set it down on the floor near her bed. If she tried to drink it all, she'd probably end up in the hospital.
With an exasperated sigh, she laid back down on the bed and let the alcohol mingle with her bloodstream. Her pulse was insane and it was all she could hear anymore.
A knock came from her door and since there were only two people living in the apartment, she knew exactly who it was. "Fuck off, Luke," she groaned, turning so that her back faced the door.
Her eyes stared out the large window in her room that overlooked the city. Lights twinkled, which had become her own urban version of the night sky, and she sighed, wishing she could just fly away.
Her ears perked up when she heard the door open and she cursed the designer of their building for not thinking about putting locks on the bedroom doors. She could hear him shuffle in, stopping momentarily to pick up the bottle laying on the floor. Y/N felt the bed dip near her feet and she shut her eyes, not wanting this to happen.
"We need to talk," Luke said sternly, his voice low.
"What part of fuck off do you not understand? You are the second to last person I want to talk to right now," Y/N squeaked out.
"We're talking this out. I don't want my favorite roommate being mad at me forever," Luke pouted.
"I'm your only roommate, you dipshit," she pointed out, her eyes still focused outside of her window.
"I just want to know why you're upset," he sighed, running a hand through his hair.
At this point, all the alcohol that Y/N had inhaled was in her bloodstream and she could feel the effects taking over her. Feeling a little discombobulated, she slowly turned so that she laid on her other side, her view on Luke's side profile. She wasn't going to make any sudden movements or else she'd be dizzy and she'd end up throwing up, which she didn't want to do on her bed.
"Why am I upset? Well, for starters, you decided to fuck my best friend," she began, the wine giving her a good ole' confidence boost. "Like honestly Luke, what the fuck. There are a million girls out there and you had to choose my best friend."
"Jeez, I'm sorry that I hooked up with your best friend. It was a one time thing, it won't happen again," he apologized, wanting to diffuse this whole situation all together.
"This isn't about just that! Do you even realize how many times I have to sit around literally hearing you having sex? Like you don't even warn a person!" She yelled, throwing her hand up in the air for dramatic effect. "And for the record, I'm more mad at her for breaking a promise to me right now."
Luke gave her a confused look and she shook her head, sitting up because she was about to yell and the anger would not radiate as well if she decided to do it while laying on her side like a tired puppy.
"You aren't making sense," Luke said, shaking his head.
"Honestly, Luke. You are so stupid sometimes. Like I cannot even believe how obtuse you can be. You took a course on psychology! You shouldn't be so bad at this!" Y/N exclaimed, both of her hands in the air as she spoke.
"Bad at what?" He questioned, his voice getting louder to match hers. The fact that she wasn't being straight-forward was beginning to upset him.
"Reading this situation, Luke. Like honestly are you so fucking blind that you can't even see why I'm upset about seeing you come out of that god-forsaken bedroom with my best friend?"
Luke soaked up her words and thought about it and then he mentally slapped himself in the face. "You like me?" His tone was one of someone who was completely dumbfounded.
"Yes, you idiot! I've literally had a crush on you for a year and you haven't picked up on my subtle hints once! Do you realize how agonizing it is to come home to the sounds of moans and grunts, knowing that you're in there with yet another disposable girl?"
With each word, tears threatened to fall as Y/N realized that it wasn't just a crush, she was falling in love with Luke. Surely, it wasn't something she anticipated, but it was what it was.
When Luke just stared at her with wide eyes, she began sobbing because of her realization that she had ruined this whole situation by confessing her love to her roommate. His arms wrapped around her and she couldn't fight it because the energy from her alcohol buzz was gone.
Y/N continued to cry, her tears soaking Luke's bare chest, wanting this night to end. She could feel her body slump against Luke and he sighed, moving strategically so that the end result was the two of them laying on her bed, their bodies pressed to each other.
"Don't cry over me, Y/N. It's not worth it," he breathed, rubbing circles onto her exposed stomach.
"I can't help it," she croaked.
"I'm such a fucking idiot," he mumbled against her skin.
"No you're not," she sighed, feeling her tears subsiding.
"Y/N, do you even realize why I've been hooking up with girls or why I even broke up with my last girlfriend?" He asked, making her lift her head up from the bed.
She peeled his arm off of her so she could turn around to face him. "No, but I'm quite afraid of what you're about to drop on me."
"I started feeling butterflies when I was around you and I found myself more nervous when we talked and there was no doubt in my mind that I was slowly falling in love with you. I didn't want to ruin the great roommate dynamic we had, so I started hooking up with girls to try and get my mind off of it," he explained, a blush rising to his cheeks as he confessed all of this.
"I want to punch you in the face so bad right now, but I won't because it's cute. But what the fuck, Lucas," Y/N huffed.
"I know, I fucked up," he smiled.
"Yeah, well if I wasn't so into you, I'd totally never forgive you, but I simply have to forgive you," she said, bringing up her hand to trace the shape of his jawline.
He leaned into her touch and she smiled, knowing that this was exactly what she had wanted for a year. His ocean eyes stared back at her in the soft glow of midnight and whether it was the alcohol or not, she leaned in and connected their lips, catching Luke by surprise. His hand found the back of her neck, pulling her closer and Y/N's body felt hot again, but this time it wasn't because of the alcohol.
When the two of them parted, Luke ran a hand through his hair and took a deep breath in. "For the record, I think you should talk to Jade. We didn't have sex because she started feeling guilty while we were making out," Luke admitted.
Nothing but relief washed over Y/N knowing that her roommate and crush didn't violate her best friend in the way that she had previously perceived. However, now Y/N felt bad for not letting her explain the situation. She tried to get up from the bed to reach her phone, but Luke pulled her back down so she was snuggled against him.
"I have to fix this," Y/N whined, feeling like a fool.
"It's late. You can fix it in the morning. You and I both know that she'll forgive you and apologize a million times," he mumbled.
She knew he was right and relaxed into the bed, embracing the warmth of Luke's arms wrapped around her body.
"I fucking hate you sometimes," she sighed, closing her eyes. Alcohol made her tired, so there was no doubt that she would soon fall asleep.
"Love you too, babe," he laughed.
