The diary of a fiend

Contemplating

Once more moon.
Play the song again to me until it hits noon.
I want to reminisce the very fact that she left you.
You she left.
For another guy who could love her best.
And you left the other all alone.
Another promise broken.
Oh hell no.
This is why god doesn't listen to you.
Leaves you talking to the moon.
Because he won't listen to another fool.
Who broke away the curtain to see what was new.
You bargained for more than you had
And when you finally saw it go didn't laugh...
No...
You didn't laugh...
You wanted to help and recede the bad act.
That reason why you can act...
You wanted to be better.
Better than before.
No more shows
You'll let her know...
That is.
If she hasn't already gone from your very soul...
Now you're just thinking.
To yourself.
In a dimly lit room
With your only company
Being the moon.
Want it messy?
Bullet to hit the floor
Leaving nothing but shell casings?
Or maybe rope to do the trick.
Tie a knot and let yourself get ripped.
Because you know why.
Walking around the world without your heart
Just drives you wild sometimes.
Looking for a lover in the alley
Or maybe near you who has loved you before
But never paid no mind too.
But now, you're making her look like a fool.
You just don't get it do you?
The world would be such a better place without you.
So go.
Get.
No ones going to miss a little spic
Who lies with his own shit.
Pull the trigger.
Tie the knot.
Because whatever way you do.
You know it won't stop.
It never stops...
You wake up with a feeling of anger.
Or regret.
And better yet.
You let the nicotine control your mindset.
Not everyone does drugs young son.
But in the morning dew
I do at least a line or two.
And before you say.
"Another color boy on the scene."
Think please.
I may act like a fiend.
But my words!
Don't they mean anything...?
I stay up.
Night after night.
Perfecting my decision to let you know.
Why I want to be.
Out of sight...
Out of mind...
That's why I get high.
Finally...
I broke the mirror and this third person scene.
Confused?
This whole time.
I was talking about me.
Now I shattered glass and placed a curse.
Seven years doesn't even seem like enough...
But this verse.
Its too long for me to tell you all about me.
And my dreams.
No
Night terrors.
I toss and turn on the dime
Whenever you are there to let me no.
"You can die and no one would care."
Well you know what?
You're right...
You're absolutely right...
And before I go
I must say.
Do you ever feel like your losing faith?
I did last night.
In the form of a prayer that can't be.
He shattered her dreams.
And mine.
So now I lay me down to sleep
And pray for the lord
My soul to be reaped
By others.
Because I wish I could always be her lover...
Rose...
I miss you most...
Please...
Don't go...
Even in my dreams
You leave me all alone in a cocoon for me to weep
But not anymore...
Another drink and I should be fine.
A goodnight kiss and a simple wish.
Do me this favor...
And let me die with this simple bliss.
You would've been find if I left.
Let the doppelganger know though
You'll cease to exist as soon as I go...
I chose tonight.
The rope is fastened to tight...
Good.
From the roof
I fall.
Not my death
But I'll just hang like a ragdoll...
It all flashes before me...
Now I lay me down to sleep
And pray
For the lord.
My soul to repeat...