Rain....Is it really that good?

God I need this girl!

Dear diary,

He did it again last night. This has been the third time this week that he’s done it. Really I don’t get if he has a bad day then rant about it not hit me. At least he didn’t hurt me as bad as last time. Last time I had to say I fell downstairs. I don’t like lying but sometimes it’s necessary. At least he hasn’t touched me yet this week but I have a feeling that’s going to end because really? He does it every Friday. But I’m not looking forward to it. Mom’s too sick to get out of bed and I brought cookies over to her friend Jen’s house and I met the guy I met at the diner. The guy that gave me a ride. Apparently, that’s his mom but he realized my bruise under my eye where the man, who shall not be named, hit me last night. When he asked about it I ran away what was I suppose to say? My dad beats me and rapes me? I don’t think so. Mom doesn’t have that long to live says the doctors but she told them she’s strong enough to go on a rollercoaster. I laughed and half cried at her joke and held on to her week hand.

When mom dies he’s going to get a lot worse. I know it; I can feel it deep in my soul. I’m so scared though. I don’t have anyone taking care of me and I have to work two jobs since mom cant work. The feelings are coming but I don’t want them. I’m scared, alone, and feel as if my soul is crying.

I hear him coming up the stairs and he’s angry. I might just get hit tonight too. God I need help. Goodbye for now diary.

                                                                                    Sapphire

*          *          *

I wake up with a kink in my neck which hurts like hell. I hear my mother and Tony downstairs making breakfast in the kitchen. They sound so happy together that I don’t want to go down to spoil their moment. I slowly stand up try to get the kink out of my neck. I think of the strange dream I had last night. I was back at the café with Sapphire and it was just the two of us. She had bruises all of her as if she was beaten very badly. She also looked scared to be alone with me. I tried everything to calm her down but in the end she ran away. Maybe my dream was trying to tell me that it would never happen between me and her. I don’t believe it though. I control whatever happens and I need to see her. While I was still determined I change clothes and put some gel in my hair. When I look decent enough I go downstairs to grab something to eat. I look around and see that mom and Tony disappeared but shrug and grab a banana. I’m out the door so fast that the door is still open as I jump into my car. I drive to the bakery and walk in seeing Tony behind the counter. I smile at him and ask him if he’s seen Sapphire.

“Sorry just missed her. Her dad’s over there maybe he can be of assistance” he says as he cleans off the counter. I go over to the man who happens to be Trevor and examine him for a minute. He’s a big tough guy who looks like a biker and doesn’t have a soft bone in his body. I sit down in front of him and he looks up at me with black beady eyes that remind me so much of my fathers that I cringe just a little and see red in my vision. I remind myself that this man is not my father and he never will be. Finally, he speaks,

“What you want?” he asks sounding angry even though he’s more annoyed if anything.

“I’m Josh Jones I’m looking for your daughter Sapphire”

“What she do now?” he asks

“Nothing I want to talk to her”

He stands up and gets ready to leave, “Sorry young man but my daughter will not be seeing you around for awhile and I will have a chat with her about stopping by when her mother is ill.” He turns around and leaves to go up the stairs. I sigh and stand up feeling defeated. One thing I knew though was that I needed to talk to Sapphire. Today. I jump into my car and start driving around town looking for her. Finally, at around noon I give up and go back home in utter defeat. Of course, mom is at work and I have the house to myself. Joy. I make myself a sandwich and look out the window staring off into space. I was so out of it that I didn’t hear the door open. I look at the door and see Sapphire standing there. She looked different then the last time I saw her but she looked just the same. Looking like an angel that is always with me. I put my sandwich on a plate and we just stare at each other. Like ones it those romantic books I’m always hearing about. We just stare at each other not moving any closer but somehow being the closest we’ve ever been. The bruise under her eye was still there just proving that someone can hurt her. It made me mad. I barely knew this girl but I wanted to protect her. I wanted to protect this girl with my life if I had to. Finally, she speaks like the angel she is.

“I never did learn your name”

“I’m Josh”

“Pleased to meet you Josh” she gives me one of the brightest smiles I have ever seen. Before I know what’s happening I’m in front of her touching the bruise. As I touch it I notice she doesn’t flinch and when I ask what happened she just tells me that she it herself there. Which I know is not true. She wouldn’t get that much of a bruise like that. She avoids my questions though and just looks out the window. I look at her amazed that this girl ran from her house to just find out my name. I ask about her father and she freezes like I said something wrong. Apparently her father is a sore topic which I understand. As I look her up and down I see more bruises and outside I look all calm but inside I’m freaking out. The bruises remind me of when my dad beat my mom. These must be the same thing. I ask what happened but she just says she fell. If I know one thing its that you don’t get that many bruises from ‘falling’. I make her sit on the couch as I get an ice pack. I come back into the living room to find her gone. I rub my eyes too see if she really was there or if I was imagining her. I sit on the couch ready to believe that it was just a dream when I see a piece of paper with a ten digit number on it. By the number it says not to call after 11. I hold the paper close to me as if it were a life line.