The Girl with Scarlet Wrists [Rewriting]

The Girl with Scarlet Wrists Chapter 9

( Important A/N: I’m not really going to elaborate on her time in the institution maybe I’ll have her do a diary thing and publish it separately. But it’s a little long for the book at this moment.)

Chapter 9:

2 months later:

Well I haven’t cut in weeks now, and my wrist- or arm for that matter, itches like hell.

I couldn’t cut even if I wanted to, the but this no cut metal thing over it, its like a no chew cast for dogs except metal, and can only be unlocked with a key, which they only happen to do 3 times a week to clean it and monitor infection.

 Marissa and Rick came for a visit the other day. I begged them not to bring Julia.

They told me how sorry they were, and that they never meant for this to happen, blah blah blah. Am I still a little upset.

Yeah a little. But its not their fault.

We all know who’s fault it is. I shuddered just thinking about him. How he could betray me like that.

The extremely painful look on his face when I told him I used to love him. Past tense. 
 I on the plus side I do have a lot of contact with the outside world.

They have Internet and TV and magazines here.

Its not so bad. Kara and Sammy visit every chance they get and they even got permission from Tide Ridge to deliver my homework so that they can help me study for exams.

I've suffered so much here, locked in a room with blades all around me. The only thing thatseparated me from that heaven was a thick ass glass.

I scratched at it until my nails were raw, I had no nails left after the three hour mark. I gave up around 5 hours or so.

Other methods were hours of boring ass therapy, and just plain cutting me off cold turkey.

Jane says I’ll get out soon.

Approximately 4 days, as long as my flashbacks stay under control. I’ve been taking special therapy courses for that. Boring as hell but I suppose their “helping”.

As for the memory. I lie, I say it's getting better but I keep failing the pre-tests they give me, I hide and change them before they can see the score, I make sure their not to high so they don't seem suspicious.

Things like remembering birthdays, or good events that have happened.

I'm leaving soon. Am I glad? Hell yeah. Jane has been the biggest help. She's grown on me like a mother. Sorry Marissa.

I opened a empty diary that Kara had dropped off for me and started to write simple things that I was taught to practice so I could recall things from my broken memory.

"My name is Larissa, I am 16. I was adopted by Marissa and Rick, Julia is my little sister she is 6 years old. I cut. I am a cutter. I am healing. I will heal. Kara and Sammy are my two best friends. I then move onto the more complicated stuff.

My ex is Chase. He betrayed me. I'm in Tide Ridge, but it is healing me. I am coping. My biological parents were murdered in Russia. I was four...or three.. I'm not sure. It's okay to be unsure. My father was the owner of some corporation. I am from Russia. I am 100% Russian. I..... can't remember anything else.

I put my pen down frustrated trying to clear my head.

What was the directors name at the orphanage? Mila, or Megan?

I sighed. There is no use.

I tucked my self in an went into a dreamless sleep.

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