A Ship Without Sails

Chapter 20

There was no time to scream, brace herself, or take a breath. She hit the rocks hard, and she felt as if every bone in her body had shattered. Her head slammed into the river, and she gasped for breath, only to swallow the mucky river water.

She struggled to raise her head, but everything was a muddled mess around her. She couldn't tell if her head was even still connected to her neck. The fall had rattled every thought in her mind. She managed to lift her chin and rest it on a flat rock, above the water. She tried to form a coherent thought, but her vision was going black and mind shutting down. She blinked rapidly, determined to survive. She wasn't sure how much damage she had taken, but she knew she was alive for now. She had to make every second count.

She made her arms tuck underneath her and she did a clumsy push-up motion, lifting her upper body out of the river, still lying on her stomach. She moved her right leg and pushed herself up, into a kneeling position.

It took her a moment to catch her breath. She wrenched herself onto a large, flat rock and flopped onto the dry surface. She looked at the bank and it seemed so far away, even though it was only a couple yards from her. She tried to move her left leg, and pain shot up it. Her head ached and her vision was still foggy. She felt warmth from her stomach and put her hand on it, and it was met with warm, sticky blood. She would have gasped if she had the air.

I have to make it to the bank, she thought in desperation, but the feat seemed impossible. Using all of the strength she had left, she threw herself at the land. Her fingertips reached grass and sand and she grasped anything she could get her hands around. She dragged herself up, farther away from the water. She felt heavy and dead tired. I must have a concussion, she thought as she passed out.

She awoke to strong arms carrying her to the picnic benches and laying her down on a table top. She tried to open her eyes but the bright sunlight blinded her. She attempted to speak, but her voice couldn't come out.
"Shh," a voice murmured soothingly. "An ambulance is coming for you."

Relief washed over Shayna, calming her down. She heard the sirens and winced at the harsh noise, but was thankful that help had come. She went limp when she was lifted onto the stretcher and fell asleep on the ride to the hospital.

"Shayna!" a voice exclaimed. Shayna's eyes snapped open. She was staring at the ceiling of a hospital room. Worried faces were clustered around her. She could pick out her parents and sister, and Kurt. She figured the others were doctors or nurses, judging from their scrubs.

"Oh, she's awake!" Daisy cried. She hugged her little sister tightly, as if to never let her go. "I'm so sorry," she sobbed, "I'm sorry for being mean. Please don't try to die again."

"Try?" Shayna whispered, her voice hoarse. "You think I tried to kill myself?"

"You mean you didn't?" Daisy's eyebrows furrowed. "You didn't jump?"

"No! I was pushed!" Shayna felt her heart pounding in the chest. She tried to sit up but was quickly pushed down by a nurse.

"You broke your leg and had a major concussion, honey," she said quietly. "It's natural for your brain to erase any memories of such intense pain."

"I didn't jump!" Shayna protested. She didn't know if she could win an argument in the state she was in, but she did know that she hadn't tried to kill herself. She had felt hands, large hands, push her. Hard.

"Yes, yes. Now, calm down, try to get more sleep." The nurse pulled the covers up to Shayna's chin, propped her head up on another fluffy pillow, and smiled a fake smile. "You'll be fine."

"I didn't jump! I was pushed!!" Shayna insisted, looking from family member to family member in desperation. All she saw was worry on their faces. Her eyes landed on Kurt.

His eyes were wide, his face pale. He looked much older than 17 years old; he looked beaten down, ragged. Shayna felt her heart break a little every time she looked at him, but now it was splitting in half.

"I'll sleep," she sighed, settling down into the bed. Relief washed over her parent's faces. Shayna glanced at Daisy. Her light green eyes were hard and glassy with shock. "I'm sorry for worrying you guys."

Her family filed out of the room in silence. Kurt lingered for a second and looked at Shayna's broken body lying on the hospital cot. His eyes met hers and she felt sadness from them. Shayna opened her mouth to say something, and at the same time Kurt did the same, but the nurse waved him out of the room. Shayna slumped down under the blankets and fell asleep.