Drums Of The City Rain (Gerard Way Fanfic Book 2)

Chapter 21

I smiled slightly for a few moments, then I froze because I fully realized what had just happened.

He kissed me. 

Then a painful memory came back to me. A memory I had buried away in my mind. I never wanted to remember it . The last time I remembered it was when those two guys tried to do the same thing to me in New York City. But that time, Gerard was there. But not before then. 

~Flashback~ 

I was 12 and my father had just gotten home from work, except it was late, so he obviously went somewhere after work - a bar. He smelled heavily of alcohol and his speech was slurred, his steps wobbly and aimless. I was frightened because he came towards me after a few moments, I expected him to hit me, but he didn't, instead he cornered me. 

"Where's your mother?" He spat. 

I shook my head. "I...I don't k-know." I replied, hands starting to shake.  

"Well, you'll just have to do." He said. I didn't know what he meant until he grabbed me low on the waist and pulled me into him. My heart pounded out of sheer terror and my palms began to sweat. He grabbed my chin and kissed me, then, I heard someone yelling - my mother. 

"What the hell do you think you are doing?!" She yelled, pulling him backwards by the shirt.  

I was shocked, she stood up for me. 

My dad stood up and shoved her back. "Don't touch me, woman!" 

I wanted to puke. My sides still felt as if he were touching them and i franctically rubbed my face where he had kissed it, feeling dirty, exposed and vialated. Him and my mother stood there yelling at each other and I just ran up to my room. 

I took a shower to wash away the feeling but it wouldnt go away. I cried and cried and they continued to yell. 

~End flashback~ 

I put a hand over my mouth as my eyes began to fill with tears. My knees felt weak and I turned away from him, walkingin the opposite direction. 

"Dawn, wait!" He call after me. "I'm sorry." 

I kept walking and didnt look back. I felt a hand wrap around my arm, not in a violent way, but I quickly pulled away with more memories flashing through my mind of all the times that has been done to me. Gerard noticed it and instead moved in front of me. 

"I am so sorry." He said with a guilty look. " I shouldnt've. I shouldnt've done that." 

I just shook my head, not able to form words. A warm tear fell to the snow at my feet. It wasnt really his fault. 

"Please say something." 

I looked up at him and opened my mouth to speak but when I did, what came out with cracked and barely audible. He looke at me with sympthy and pulled me into him. He gently rubbed up and down my back, his hand was warm. There was a different feeling towards what happened a few minutes ago and what happened  few years ago, despite my reaction. I didnt want what happened when I was 12, but what just happened, I did. Gerard wasnt making me feel vialated, it was the memories of what my dad did. 

I pulled away from the hug, but just enough to look up at him. I stood up on my tip toes so I could reach, and pressed my lips to his. This time, wful memories didnt flood back into my mind. A feeling of excitment but at the same time calm. My heart was racing but not out of fear. 

We pulled away from each other and smiled. We both laughed a little and I looked down at my hands which were being held by his. "We should..... We should probably get home." I said, looking out at the setting sun. 

"Yeah." He agreed.   

***** 

~Gerard's POV~ 

She fell asleep in the car on the way home so he carried her up to her room. I laid her in her bed, and brushed the hair out of her face. She is so beautiful. And I dont think she even thinks so at all. Which is really sad. So much of her life is sad, I have my problems, but I dont want her to hurt. She has hurt enough and it isnt fair. 

She has gotten to much better, though, since I first met her.   She is still shy of cource, but then she was so broken she couldnt even talk. And even though she still faces problems, she is so much better. The shy girl who was assigned to be my lab partner for a project in science, who knew that I would end up loving her.