Televised || Punk Chandler Riggs

18. Gone Part 1/3

•When everything's meant to be broken, I just want you to know who I am•
...
Carmin's pov
I layed in the bed with Chandler behind me,his arms wrapped around my waist. He was sleeping and I was just on my phone. The loud speaker came on...oh yeah. This is a school, I forgot.
"All students please report to the auditorium."
The announcer sounded like they were crying. I sat up and shook Chandler. He got dressed and we went down to the auditorium.
Almost the whole school was there...that never happens. But the worst thing was, everyone was quiet. You could almost hear the silence.
Chandler and I quietly took our seats as the head of the school walked out onto the stage, microphone in hand. He had dried tears down his face.
"Hello everyone, we have called you here to tell you about the loss of one of beloved students...."He took a shaky breath. "Dannielle Ford."
Danni?No, no it can't be. I started looking around, flipping my head from side to side. So I could see she was here, waiting for here to yell something like. "Um, I'm right here...asshole"
But she didn't.
My hand Chandler was holding started shaking rapidly. Tears were streaming down almost everyone's face, including mine.
And Chandler...the toughest person I knew. Had his head down.
Nobody knew what to say, or what to do. We were all speechless. No not that. We weren't speechless. It wasn't that at all. We didn't want to speak without her there to mock us playfully. We didn't want to laugh or smile, because she wasn't there to laugh with us. Nobody dared to look at eachother, because we'd be too disappointed when it wasn't her face staring back at us.
The head of the school began to talk again. "We will be holding a ceremony in her memory this Thursday at 1:30 pm. All classes are excused for the week." He said as he set the microphone down. The lady from the front desk then came out and picked it up and began to talk.
"You are all now excused. Thank you." She said.
Chandler put his free hand on top of mine. "C'mon time to go." He said quietly. I bit my lip and stood with him. I held my tears back and tried to be strong.
We were both silent in the way to the staircase.
We made it to our room. I looked at the door, this was also the door to Danni's old room. I faced Chandler.
"I love you." I said as I started crying again. "No, don't start doing that." He said grabbing me and pulling me into him.
I hear him unlock the door. He pulls both of us inside.
I detach myself from his grasp and go lay down on the bed. I see Chandler go into the bathroom.
I overhear his conversation.
"Sam?" Chandler said, his voice cracking.
Was he crying? This is going to be bad. Really, really bad.
....
Chandlers pov
"Sam?" I asked as he picked up the phone. I broke down, I can't take it anymore. I just can't.
So yes, I'm crying. Chandler fucking Riggs is crying, alert the damn media.
"I know." Sam said with a sigh.
"I've known her all my life." I said, wiping the tears away. "Do you need to come over?"He asks.
"Yeah." I said, sniffling. "I'll see you then." Sam said. I nodded even though he couldn't see me and hung up.
I walk out and see Carmin asleep. I leave her a note saying I went to Sam's.
I walked down the hall till I came to Sam's room, that he now shared with Jane. I didn't bother knocking, I just walked in. The second he saw me, he stood up off the couch. He came over and hugged me. We just cried.
And trust me. Sam and I don't cry.
I sighed a shaky breath and pulled back.
"She won't leave my head." I said going over to the couch.
"Yeah...we all grew up together." Sam said, sitting next to me.
"Did she commit suicide?" I ask, looking over at him. Sam sighed. I looked back down and cried. No, not cried. I balled my fucking eyes out. I heard Sam crying next to me.
"We're so being such fucking pussies right now." I said laughing through tears. I saw him smile a little.
Just then the horrible speaker went off again. It spoke words an came to life.
"Chandler Riggs report to the office." It said.
I said goodbye to Sam and went down to the office. I saw the woman I used to be a student worker for. She smiled at me.
"Hi sweetheart." She said with her firm southern accent. I just waved.
She handed me a note.
"Danni left you a note before she...left." She said. I gulped back tears and choked out a thank you before going back to mine and Carmin's room.
I opened the door and walked in. I heard the shower running, meaning Carmin was in the bathroom.
I sat in the chair and opened the letter. It read:
'Danni and Chan
Best friends for all time
Together forever
Partners in crime.'
Dear Chandler,
If you have decide to keep reading or even bother to open this letter, I thank you.
But there isn't much to say.
I'm gone, or at least I will be by the time you read this. And I don't have much time left before the pills kick in.
This wasn't yours or Sam's fault.
Chandler...I need you to forget about me. Move forward in your life. You were always going to make the world a better place Chandler.
I wasn't, not without you by my side anyway. I couldn't continue to hold you back.
It's not just that, I'm sad. Or...was sad. I'm sick and tired of living like this. Alone, in a mental hospital. We're all psychopaths. And I was the worst of all. I've been destroying myself by holding on for all this time. I'll be better off now.
Somewhere where, I'll finally get to happy. Or maybe I'll haunt you, yeah I'll do that.
As you're reading this, I'll be sitting right next to you, holding your hand through this.
I'm sorry Chandler but just know that I'm happy now. So be happy.
I hope you'll get every single one Of your hopes and dreams. Now...go change the world like I know you can. Love you from wherever I am now, to the moon, and all the way back.
-Danni'
My tears soak through the paper.
It just hit me that I actually lost her. She's gone.
She's gone.
----------------------------------------------So this is the 1st part of a THREE PART CHAPTER.
I apologize if I made anyone cry. But this is just the beginning.
So get ready for an emotional roller coaster.
Love you madly.
-Scar💜