Spazzy Magazine June 2013

Fess Up

F E S S     U P

Sent by: The potty-confession 

I was at my cousin's wedding where they had portable potties, unfortunately, there were only two.  One of the potties was occupied and the other one had the lock broken; but I had to go so bad that I couldn't contain it and used the broken one. I lifted my dress and tried to pee as fast as possible but before I could finish my cousin's husband and boy around my age opened the door, and since it didn't said it was occupied, caught me. It was very embarrassing! Plus, he was super cute! It was rather awkward but in the end we talked and he promised to never tell. At least the embarrassment had a nice ending!

Sent by: The six-year-old-peeing machine

A little girl about six-years-old had to go pee but her father insisted on taking her the Spiderman ride and then she could go pee. She agrees to it and does the line. When they get in the ride they buckle up and the little girl's pee urge begins even more. In the middle of the ride, they suddenly stop and the dad presumes it's because they are fixing it but the little girl not holding it anymore pees in the ride. When the ride was fixed and she walked out, she started to cry of embarrassment. Poor little girl!

Sent by: The trouble-mud-maker

I have a little confession to make...

There was a girl in my school that was envied by everyone and wanted by every girl. I admit, she was very pretty but I never envied her whatsoever. I thought the girl was a very nice, sweet girl, who didn't care for popularity whatsoever, but boy was I wrong! The one day I went to talk with her for the first time...I'll just let you see what happened. This was around lunch time,

Me: "Hey! What's up, Angela?" (I'm smiling friendly.)

She: (Look around her and scoffs.) Are you talking to me?

Me: (Gets annoyed with the bitch and decides to get back at her for her rudeness.) I'm sorry are you not only deaf but dumb too?

She: (Sends me the middle finger and walks away.)

What happened later on when our Jim class was finished and we were heading up to take a shower. 

She: (Yells angrily.) Who changed my shampoo lotion for mud!?

And that's how you get a bitch!

Sent by: The tricked-dog-food-taster 

Since I was a little kid, my mother always told me how curious I was. So once when I was fifteen, the whole family went into the mall. We were all walking and chatting. We returned back from the mall to my house after we bought what we wanted. After a while, my dad decides on putting some food to the dog. Then he looks up at me says that he will eat dog food because it taste good. I told he wouldn't do it but then I see how he gets his hand into the food and eats four dog food bite. 

And I, being extremely curious, get my hand in and eat it too just not with the satisfied expression my dad has to which my dad explodes in laughter. Later on, he explains to the whole family and me, that he didn't really eat dog food but that he grabbed some 'Cocoa Puffs' and since they have the same similar form and color tricked me I to it; but that in reality, he didn't expect for me to actually eat it. Hmm, well I can say that it doesn't taste any good at all!

That's all for the Fess up Column! Next month, I'll bring more of these amusing confessions, but if you want to confess...just private message me!