Sinistral

Chapter Twenty One

I've been to hell and back again with Zack, well that's what it had felt like. We were still hanging in strong, we have had our moments but we are still together that was what mattered at the time. That was the most important thing to me. That I still had him, beside me.

I've mentioned once before that my weakness is being alone and that it still is now. That's because its tortured me many times through out on earth and in Sinistral. Once in that sand storm. I may have sounded like I never lost Zack again, I wish I could say that but I wouldn't be stating the truth. It had started again. That horrible feeling in the bottom of my stomach, Lucas well and truly digging into the only part which he knew. My weakness, being alone forever. Someone giving up on me, yet again. It felt worse though because I was losing my mind, losing the only thing I had in Sinistral. My best friend.

I wish I could tell you that things got easier. But nothing ever does, especially not being me. It began with her, with Amelia. It also ended with her too. But really, it was him. Lucas messing with my mind. It has always been him...

I didn't know whether this was a nightmare or whether I had somehow got my life back and was back on earth again when my foster parents were drunk and needed someone to take their anger out on being the only person there... I was a victim in their constant abuse both verbal and physically.

This time something was different though. There was someone else here to, hurling verbal abuse at me. at first I couldn't make out who it was, I had curled myself into a ball on the floor, while my foster parents continued causing me pain, but when the voice spoke I shivered, it made my ears ring so loud it could have been coming from right inside my head, it was unmistakeably Lucas "Look at you," he sneered, "Lying there just taking this abuse, look at how weak you are."

I felt tears prickle my eyes. My foster father's voice over powering my foster mother, his hand collided with her face. I felt myself shaking. Ever part of it, I remember as if it was yesterday. It had always been lingering in the back of my head. Even after all the help I had, I never was fully alright with what had happened. "I'm..not weak I just," I stumbled over my words. I found it so hard to speak properly, Lucas pieced my very soul, made me feel so numb and scared inside. I could never find the right words to say. "You have always been a victim. You know I'm right. You know that as well as I. The weak one, always the coward one," he teased his words echoing around in my head.

My foster mother cussed me for not being a good enough son, she said she wished I was dead, I got that line a lot back on earth, she got her wish, I thought numbly. Lucas crouched down beside me, he whispered "I'v got something to tell you, and your not going to like it." I forced myself to look up at him, he was grinning so hard, it made me want to beat it right of his face, I clenched my fists as he went on "Your so called friend... Zack," he moved a little closer his face inches from mine, "Well you may as well forget about him, because that's what he's going to do with you. I did warn you, about him before."

"No, that was a lie and so it this," I said through greeted teeth. My foster father grabbed me by the hair and pinned me against the wall. Fear took over, that same fear that I had experienced before when this happened. "Now you know why they never treated you right. I mean they adopted you, wanting you to be the best son you could be and you disappointed them. Did that a lot didn't't you? You deserve everything you got...," he trailed off.

"No, I didn't...I didn't do nothing wrong!" I snapped.

Lucas laughed while my foster father banged my hand against the wall repeatedly, my head started to spin, my vision started to blur, I blinked trying to focus on something anything, suddenly I felt my foster father's grip loose from my hair and it was replaced by a hand wrapped tightly around my throat, the hand squeezed hard threatening to burst my lungs as I gasped for air.