Chapter 19
I ran off the stage and out of the pub. Austin was speed walking back to the hotel. "Austin. Baby wait!" I caught up to him and grabbed his arm to turn him around. He was drunk and smelled of flowers.
"What is going on?" I recoiled at the thought of him being with Ella.
"You're flirting with other guys now? I say we're at a bar so we can meet up, and you go to a different one?" His words are slurred and he isn't walking straight.
"We went to the one by the river, we called and texted you! You didn't answer me! Alan even came and got Emily, and he said you were at the room already. So please make this all my fault. I'm not the one who smells of alcohol and another woman!" I yelled. How could he accuse me, when he's the one being suspicious. Our first night in Paris and we are fighting, great.
He looked down at me and sighed, "You just don't care, that's what it is. You are only here for my fame. You don't even love me." There were tears in his eyes.
"Austin, I'm not one of those crazy girls that tell you I love you after the first day. I really believe I can love you, but it's only been two months, I'm still trying to get over the fame. You know how torn up I was because I didn't want to be with you for your fame. I wanted you, alone."
I tried to conceal my tears, rule number one is not to explain yourself to someone who is drunk. They wouldn't remember the next day anyway... I hated myself for thinking this way but the rules of being a daughter of an alcoholic. I didn't want to think of Austin that way.
"Why didn't you leave with Alan?" He shivered.
"Let's go to our room and we'll discuss it there, okay?" I grabbed his hand, he recoiled, "what's wrong?"
"I'm not going back with you... if you won't explain it to me now, then you can go back alone."
"Austin you're drunk, I'll explain it all tomorrow morning, okay? Lets just get you back to the hotel."
"No, I'm not going."
"Where would you go then?"
"Somewhere where you aren't. Obviously." He scoffed.
"Then go, because I'm not talking to a drunk." I tried to hold back my tears, but they started rolling down my cheeks. He chuckled and started walking to the hotel.
I sat on a bench, looking out on the river, I couldn't believe how he was acting. I placed my face in my hands, sighing, how could things go from so good to so bad in such a short amount of time.
"Hey Randi."
I looked up to see a smoking Ben, "Hey."
I tried wiping the tears away, "where's the others?"
"Still in the bar, it's been an hour and you haven't texted me, I figured something big happened. So I walked out here." He sat beside me, put one arm behind me and the other holding his cigarette on his knee.
"Oh, yeah sorry. I had to figure things out for myself before I could text you." I lied, I was too confused to be talking to anyone else. "See anything worth gossiping about?" I joked.
"I saw Austin leave, but talking shit isn't my thing. The bitch will tell before anyone has a chance to." His eyes were graciously set at me.
"The bitch?" I turned to look him in the eyes, "what bitch?"
"That Ella girl, his ex? She started every issue possible with all the bands that year she was with Austin, like she tried to get with everyone, but no one would because we didn't want to hurt Austin. He was so in love with her, he even proposed to her."
My eyes got wide, "oh wow. I didn't know." I shrunk back into myself. I knew he had been hiding something from me... but a proposal, that was insane. "How long were they together?"
"Shit forever it feels, not really, uhm a year and a half, maybe two years" he looked off, then back at me. "You didn't know? He told you differently?"
"He said they were together for a summer, three years ago. But he said when he met me at the concert, he broke up with her." I sighed.
"You were the fan that he wouldn't stop talking about?" Ben smiled, "that's brilliant. He didn't break up with her though. Ella broke up with him that day, and his way of dealing with it, was to create a thing with a fan he had only met once. I mean it's sort of sweet, but it wasn't right." He sat back and took a drag from his cigarette, "I'm sorry."
I shrugged, how was I supposed to react to this. I couldn't handle it, not even a little chunk of it. I just wanted to curl up in a ball and be back in my "Austin Carlile is my dream guy" state of mind. I didn't know what to do.
"Let's get out of the cold, back to the pub or the hotel?" He rubbed my arm. "And no that wasn't a offer to go back to my room."
I rolled my eyes, "I'm not sure, can we just walk around? I don't want to really be anywhere right now."
He nodded and stood up, I pulled out a pack of Marlboro 100's, "not to waste yours." I smile and handed him one. I put one in between my lips as he kit ours together, very pro-like.
"Most people say that smoking lessens the attraction of a woman. But smoking, it suits you well." He laughed, "You've got that 'rebel child' aura."
I laughed, "if only you knew how right you were."
"Tell me then, lets have a full frontal, no jokes, all honesty questionnaire. I ask and you tell the truth." He walked backwards in front of me. "And next time, you can ask and I will answer, so I know how much crazy I'm getting into, before you realise how much crazy you're getting into."
I blushed, "I hope we can handle the crazy."
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Dreams Come True (Austin Carlile/Ben Bruce)
FanfictionRandi Vigil is just trying to figure out life, and stumbles into a dream or twisted one?