Baby, look what you've done to me || L.S AU

XXVI.

Mood : Christina Perri - A Thousand Years
One Direction - Spaces

By miracle Louis made it home, his journey tainted with his grief of once again leaving Harry. It's unfair that everytime he sees Harry he feels disgusted. Not at Harry but at himself because of what he had done to this boy, what he made him become. Harry was his trapped animal from the first day they met and he still till this day felt like nothing changed.

He made it up the steps doing his best to avoid everyone and makes it to his room. What he did was for the best. Harry would look back one day in the future and thank him for doing this. It was never about Matty that's the thing and Louis is too much of a coward to tell Harry the real reason they could never have their happy ending. Every scenario of their story would end bad and he knows that and he owed it to Harry because he was the most incredible person he's ever met, he's beautiful and kind and unique and Harry deserved his happy ending, Louis just had to accept that it would never be with him.

Perrie walks in humming, probably coming by to do her morning cleaning when she spots Louis faced down on his bed.

"Munchkin? You okay?" She sits on the bed rubbing his back, he groans and just the sound of her voice made him want to cry. He didn't like to think what his situation was because it doesn't only affect Harry it affects everyone he knew, Zayn, Perrie, his parents, friends. He hated the sight of them at the moment and he didn't want to have anything to do with them. He just couldn't handle it.

"Go away!" He screams and moves away from her touch.
"Zayn!" She shouts and exits soon returning with a sleepy faced Zayn, his hair rid of his high quiff and his tight suits in place was his batman boxers and a black t shirt.
"Lou you made it! Did everything go alright with Harry? How come he didn't stay to say hello?" Zayn went on and on with questions and eveytime Louis just wanted to disappear, the hole in his heart growing by the second.

He sits up wiping his face, looking at Zayn and Perrie standing to the side of his bed.
"I have to tell him Zayn" Perrie's face lost her colour, she starts to tremble as she holds onto Zayn for support. Zayn is much more composed than her and knots his eyebrows in confusion.

"You said you didn't want to"
"I know what I said! But you didn't see him" shamelessly he starts to cry again "he was so happy to see me, to be with me. I need to tell him"
"Lou-" but even Perrie couldn't hide it, she holds onto her mouth to stop herself from crying but it was of no use. Overwhelmed she steps out not wanting to hear the rest of the conversation.

"You've upset Pez" Zayn says as he sits next to Louis on the bed.
"I've upset everyone. That's what I do"
"Louis don't say things like that"
"Why? You know it's true"
"You're being too hard on yourself"

"It's over" Louis whispers bowing his head so he doesn't have to watch Zayn's expression fall. Warm arms wrap around him and he breaks down. Zayn only tightens his hold and allows Louis to cry into his chest. 
"He'll hate me if he knew"
"Harry could never"

Unable to contain himself, he claws at Zayn pushing him away. Zayn's face is calm even though it is soaked with tears, he holds onto Louis even tighter as he pushes and pushes against Zayn to get out. The only thoughts in his head was Harry, even though his head pounded with excruciating pain, his limbs weak but he continued to fight away Zayn, he holds on. Why didn't this happen sooner? Why did he have to meet Harry? Why now? Why is it that the first time in his life he's able to trust someone, to give his all and it still wasn't enough? Why did he have to fall in love?

Harry was right about one thing. Everyone does have a magnet that holds them together, a negative and a positive. But what happens when two magnets of the same kind attract each other? They don't match, they fall apart. Louis was the negative, Harry the only positivity in his life. He poisoned Harry from the start, he put him through so much only for his selfish desires.