Baby, look what you've done to me || L.S AU

XXVII.

Mood : Ed Sheeran - Photograph

(I'm so sorry for this)

Silence. A place. A dream. Right now all he could hope for was silence but the deafening sounds penetrate his ears, pounding against his already swollen head. It has been nothing but noise and pain these past few days even more when the memory of his boy's sweet face invade his mind. Even his beauty could not suffice the pain, so many times just the thought of him would make him forget but not even of the slightest this moment.

Pain. An emotion. A fear. Everyone always say emotional pain hurts the most. That's a lie. The people who say that have never experienced physical pain. Yes it just lasts a few minutes, hours maybe and then it's gone but in the moment not even years of yearning pain can replace the crushing feeling of bones against bones squeezing, rubbing together, burns and yet not a scream or cries can make it stop. With emotional pain there is control, a person can control their feelings, their mind can tell them to stop, to think of something else with physical pain nothing can be done except welcome it, no thinking, no doing just experiencing and the hallow dread of patience hoping it would stop.

Numbness. Numb is the body. Numb is the mind. Numb is the feelings he felt inside. Nothing but pain and silence consumed him. His mind is blank, he doesn't remember a thing. How he got here? Where he even was. Why all of this was happening? Why can't he move? Why can't he feel? Why can't he do anything? The faint visions of a boy, smile as bright as the sky fills his empty mind and every time he does he tries to make a sound, tries to feel an emotion, to speak, to touch but his body won't allow him to. Numb was the pain he wish he felt.

Darkness. A tragedy. An evil. His mind slowly being consumed by darkness as he tries to search for the light that never comes. He pushes and pushes his body to react but the more he fights the more the darkness grows. His mind is working overtime trying to keep up until he starts to feel, he starts to hear, he starts to live. Bit by bit he lets his mind react as he tries to move his hand and it moves, he tries to swallow and he does. The silence is replaced with the faint voices of his name, even though he can't see he knew those voices. One's he heard all his life but even with all his will as he tries to open his eyes they won't budge. The voices get louder and more harsh against his head but the noise was a relief since the deafening silence.

"Louis! Please Louis!" That one voice keeps calling out to him. He starts to shake fighting the pain he felt swim up to his head, his chest tightens when he feels the warm embrace and all he can think to do was smile. It was all he could do. Louis liked that saying "smile even though your heart is aching" The voice is frantic and he feels the soft hand come to his face, soft lips on his, soft cries and warm breath cover his body.

"Louis please" this time the pain was evident on the voice, desperate and needy. Louis wants to touch, he wants to see that face even if it was just glimpse but the harder he tired to more his brain pounded against his skull. With every moment that passes by it felt like ages, the pain was endless and there was not a single thing he could do about it. The feeling from his hands disappeared and the once warm touch had gone. He doesn't hear the voices anymore but inch by inch the darkness continues to grow. It's as if everything went into slow motion and the last thing that runs through his mind was Harry. He sees in the distance, the emerald beauty, sparkling in his natural glow, his long hair flows in the wind. Harry smiles so big and bright as hold his hand out for him to take. He was still unsure but when he turns around the darkness keeps spreading the only light was around his beautiful boy. Without hesitation he reaches his hands out for Harry. The more he stretches the more Harry seems to grow further apart. His body doesn't hurt anymore but he's stuck in this same spot, unable to move. He opens his mouth, surprised when he could and let the words fall out.