SAMCRO Girl

Heartache

"so you want to tell me what that was all about?" he asked making a motion to downstairs
"It was nothing honest" I said trying to be believable, he gave me a weird look
"Oh really" He asked "So that's why you're up here in tears" i looked up at him
"Look okay I said it was nothing" i said in a very annoyed tone
"You were Jealous" he said smirking, i looked up and gave him a dirty word
"really, Me Jealous of you Pft You really think to high of yourself don't you" i answered back
"high...Of myself...you think i'm going to go pining after you again" he shouted "Jeez you even believed that i loved you"
"What" i asked
"yeah that's right i just didn't want to see my best friend leave" he answered , but immediately looked guilty
"i....i need to go" i said, brushing passed him ,  i walked slowly downstairs, i could hear footsteps following me and i could hear him calling my name but i ignored him, i walked through the club house everyone was talking i could hear them ask Juice questions when he walked in but i still made my way outside, before i could walk i saw Tara being thrown off a white van with Abel , she ran up tears streaming down her face, i quickly snapped out of my absent-mindedness 
"Sophia" she managed to shout before everyone rushed out, realising what she was meaning i ran down to the road where the van was driving off i heard everyone shouting but i kept going, eventually realising i would never catch up with my child i screamed
"SOPHIA" i'm pretty sure everyone was looking at me , at this point i didn't care , there were tears streaming down my face, i looked to my left and noticed a small pink bunny, i realised it was Sophia's, I clutched the bear while crying , i was there for ages when someone touched my shoulder, it was Clay
"Come on" he said, i refused " We will find her, I Promise" he said, as he was my step dad i trusted him and i rose up, everyone was staring, isaw my mum she was hurt, Feeling Angry with the club along with hurt for my absent child , i stormed over to the group
"We need to get her back" Jax said
"im really sorry Liv" Tara cried
"It's not your fault" i said, not feeling any anger towards her. I pulled myself together got up slowly, without talking to anybody, and walked inside, I could feel everybody watching me but they knew that I didn't want to be followed.
I walked into my room, not wanting anyone to hear my cry for help, I grabbed a pillow to muffle my scream. And I screamed and screamed until I no longer had it in me, my face was stained black with mascara. I needed to pull myself together, wiping my eyes. I exited my room and walked downstairs, suddenly everyone turned and faced me, sympathy glares.
"You are going to find her" I spat out, anger rushed through me "Find her clay" I screamed again breaking down, I felt my knees giving in, strong arms caught me from behind and fell with me, holding me while I cried
"Right everyone, find the Mayans, juice stay here with her" I managed to hear Clay say, so it was juice holding me. In that moment everything that had happened in the last hour was forgotten, right there and then it was perfect, apart from the fact my daughter was missing.

"And her name is?" The police officer looked at me, everyone seemed to look sympathetic but I didn't want sympathy I wanted answers
"Miss" I heard the officer again and looked up
"Sorry, her name is Sophia-Ashlee" I spat, earning some strange looks from Juice.
"Okay that should be enough for now, Thankyou" i nodded waiting for the officers to leave.

"Did you have to be so bitter?" Juice asked me in an equally bitter tone
"Because all I want is my baby, is that a problem?" I snapped, we were obviously still mad about the whore he was riding.
"Hey I'm sorry" he said looking at me lovingly
"I know" I answered as I started to fold all of Sophia's clothes and blankets, as I did I came across her teddy bear, the Christmas present I got her two days ago. Instantly tears started forming in my eyes
"How could I fail as a mother like this" I cried into her teddy bear
"No, you have not failed that baby, don't ever say that, you are the best thing that has happened to her" I heard Juice say
"You really think that?" I asked looking up at him as he nodded, I knew he meant it, but I couldn't help but think he was trying to make up for earlier.

It was 3:40 am when the boys finally got home, they all looked tired, black rings under their eyes.
"Sorry liv, there was nothing" Chibs bellowed out in his strong Scottish voice, I slowly nodded as all hope left my body.
"Get some rest" I said with no emotion, I couldn't look at anyone but I knew inside that they were going through a tough time as well, Soph was as a part of them as she was of me.
"You need to sleep to" Jax stepped Forward
"I can't" I stuttered "I need to wait for news"
"Come on I'll wait for you, you need the rest" juice said nodding to the other guys, hesitantly I nodded and followed him up to my room. He first led down on my bed and opened his arms to me, reluctantly I followed and folded myself up into his arms. I needed this, I needed him, I needed my baby. I didn't want to fall asleep but I knew I needed to, I needed to be strong for Sophia. As soon as I closed my eyes I fell into a deep sleep.