Asylum

Chapter 9

Mr. Gilinsky and I were listen to this new song that is called Hello. The woman singing was like telling a story while singing it, it was absolutely extraordinary. I sway to the beat of the song and went into another world. I see my mother staring down at me, singing a lullaby and my father behind her looking out the window. I remember  how disappointed he was of me. All he wanted me to do was be on the honor roll. Then when I arrive home with a 92 in English he was pissed. He made sleep outside for a whole week.

"Jack,"  I heard a voice said.

I look up to see Mr. Gilinsky shaking me out of the flashback. He was wiping hot tears away from my eyes. I want to just break free from my father's disappointment in me. It is like a black cloud over my head that block out the sunshine of my life. Over the years I felt like I was not worth anyone's time.

"Jack, snap out of it," Mr. Gilinsky said shaking me a little.

You are not worth his time.

He hates you.

You are a disgrace to mankind, a mistake that has not been erased....

Yet...

I started breathing heavily like I ran around this whole asylum, I felt myself starting to shake, and tears pooling out exposing every emotion I feel. The voices inside my head telling me I am worthless, I am a mistake, and that I should drop dead. I tried to calm down, but it was almost like I lost control of my body.

"J-Jack," I manage to say.

"What is it, love?" He asked quickly.

"P-Please h-hold m-m-me," I said shaking more.

He immediately held onto me, cradling me in his arms. I look up at him as he smiled down at me. He put his hand through my knotty hair tugging it softly. It send electricity through my body and made feel a little better. I want to lift my arms, but I felt like chains were holding them down because I can not move. He trance a line down my chest to lower tummy.

He is only doing this out of pity.

I need him, I want him to be with me forever, but he does not want me with someone with an insane mind. I look away from him and cry more. I just want to loved by him. I want to be wanted by him. I feel like trash when I am around everyone else, but I feel like a diamond when I am around Mr. Gilinsky.

"J-Jack, stay with me," he said worried.

"P-Please," I manage to say.

"What do you need, Jack?" He asked squeezing my hand.

"P-Please d-do n-not throw me a-away," I said crying my eyes out.

He look at me stunned, he probably thinks I am more crazy than he thought. Only he smiled and pulled me closer to him, rubbing my back. I grabbed his lab coat and cried more. He cupped my cheeks and pulled my head up to his. He smiled again and kiss my cheek, making me blush. He wiped the tears away and gave me a 'are you crazy' look. The answer is yes I am.

"There is too much to go to waste," he whisper in my ear.

He kissed other cheek and kissed across my jawline. He planted butterfly kisses down my neck and on my collarbone. It felt something that words can not describe. It was a mixture of happiness and sadness. I was overjoyed that someone was kissing me, but sad that he is only doing out of pity. As much as I did not want to I pulled away from. I crawled over to a corner of the room and curled up into s ball.

"Jack, what is wrong?" He asked in a whisper.

"You do this out of pity," I cried.

"What?" He asked,"Jack, I would never do anything out of pity especially towards you. It is actually rare I saw my affection towards anyone. So you are very special."

Don't listen to him! He is obviously seducing you....

He will never love you, you insane freak.

My thoughts were silenced when he unzipped my jumpsuit, exposing my disgusting stomach. He looked up at me biting his lip. He then kiss across my chest which made my heart pound. He went down to my nipple and circled his tongue around it. It made me tremble like a Chihuahua. I made a sound that made him excited.

"You are truly extraordinary," he whisper in my ear.

Those four words made me want to cry and not with sadness, but with joy. He made me feel like I am the only one. I felt so loved and wanted. Words can not describe what I am actually feeling. He bites down on my other nipple which made me make that sound again.   He brings his face back up to me and smirked at my venerable state.

"You are beautiful," he whispered kissing my neck.

I pulled away from him and run to the other side of the room. I was not disgusted by his words, but surprised that he actually said that. I am not by any means necessary beautiful, just a pretty mess. I look at him who was confused of why I moved away.

"I am not beautiful," I said looking away,"Why do you say such lies?"

"I am not lying, you truly are breathtaking," he said coming closer,"How can you not see it?"

"I can not see what see because I do not know what you see," I said truthfully.

With that, he takes out his phone and gave it to me. I then saw a boy with blonde hair and ocean blue eyes. He was very pale and look sad. Just then Mr. Gilinsky came into the background.

"How are you in there?" I asked.

"It's just a reflection, I am out here," he said turning me around.

"But if that is your reflection then that boy on the phone is.... me," I said stunned.

"Now you see what I see," he said giggling,"A beautiful human being."