Addy's Lullaby

Addy's Lullaby Chapter 33

I woke up still feeling the bitterness from yesterday. I got out of bed and walked into the bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror and made a disgusted face. I officially hated myself. I couldn't believe that I had actually done it. I let rage and defeat come over me and it's a dangerous thing. I can't look at myself in a positive way anymore. I can't live like that. Feeling positive and acting like nothing had happened, well I knew for sure that that was a lie. I walked out and laid next to Justin, kissing his neck softly, "Hun, wake up. I have plans for you and your mom to go have lunch together and talk through things. I'm about to set up the reservations. Go get a shower and get dressed." He smiled at me and nodded, kissing my lips he said, "Will do, thank you for doing that. That's really nice of you." I smiled and nodded. I got up and grabbed my phone calling to make reservations. I told Gloria all of the information and she too thanked me and got ready. I kissed Justin's cheek and gave Gloria a hug. They walked out of the door and got in the car driving to the restaurant I had made reservations at for them. I walked into the bathroom and pain, regret, and sorrow hit me hard in the chest. I looked at myself in the mirror and scoffed. I started walking around looking for my stress pills. I looked in my drawer and they weren't in there. I looked in my closet, they weren't in there either. I looked all over the house but I couldn't find them. Finally I had looked in the cabinet in the bathroom that usually had the towels in it, and sure enough there they were. I grabbed them and walked to the kitchen, getting a glass of water and sitting down at the kitchen table. I opened the bottle and took a pill. Something washed over me and I looked at the bottle and felt a rush pang into my veins. I took another pill. And another. And another. I kept taking all the pills until all twenty seven pills in the bottle were gone and my body felt numb. It was a few minutes later and I felt like I was high. Everything got blurry and I could feel my blood pumping through every single one of my veins. I started walking and I walked out of the house and over to a warehouse that was by Justin's house. I looked at the staircase leading to the rooftop and I started the walk up to the roof. I set my hand on the knob and opened the door slowly. Everything was like it was in three D. I looked at the roof door and opened the small latch that led to on the roof. I walked across to the edge of the roof and looked down. Man, it was far from the bottom. Was I scared to die? Nope. Not one bit. The pills had started to kick in as soon as Justin and Gloria pulled up where I was at. They looked up at me and screaming they said, "Addy! What are you doing?! This is not the right way to handle things!" I could barely hear them, their voices started getting faint. I was standing on the edge when the pills fully kicked in. I started swaying and eventually I fell backwards off the roof. I looked at the sky and smiled softly. It was as if time had slowed down. I felt the pain of the ground on my head and back in an instant. I closed my eyes and turned my head, hearing faint screams and sirens I looked over and the last thing I saw before everything ended was beautiful little white roses, that looked like they were in three D. The last thought that ran through my mind was, Just wait, Just watch.