Looking for an answer.

Chapter 7

After the first week of school, my class with a younger one were preparing a play for our Spanish class and it was worth a whole grade. So he started talking to a girl from 10th grade and every time I was close they would look at me and sometimes she would even stare and it felt uncomfortable. I tried speaking with him later in the year but it was always awkward and he acted like I was doing something bad or annoying him. He even change his cell number, btw I’m not a stalker I only text him once and he got mad at me.

Right about the middle of March and starting April Joe started hitting on me. At first it was really awkward and weird because I didn’t like him back but I decided I was gonna go with the game just to see if he liked  having his hopes up and then being betrayed just like he does to every other girl. Most of the time we would stay up late talking on the phone and most of the time we would end up fighting because he would say he loves me but that when I say it that I was lying. Technically I was but I didn’t hate him either, I know that right know I look like a mean person for doing this but I was one time that girl and I’ve seen friends get hurt by guys like him get really hurt and I thought that know that I have the opportunity I would try to do it, just to teach him a lesson. I let all of this happen for like 3 weeks almost a month and then I told him I didn’t felt the same. And since then he never said a word to me again, really pussy if him I think because I know that I didn’t hurt his feelings.

One time in one of those stay up late calls he told me that he told Connor that he liked me. I should have ask him what he said but I didn’t and that was stupid of me. I just said “oh okay” and that was it but I didn’t knew if to believe it or not. Maybe it was good that I didn’t ask him. So know that I think about it maybe this is another reason for Connor to hate me or treat me like I’m trash. I hate that I’m so naïve at love, but I don’t know why I do that every time I get close to a guy that I really like, for example Connor I end up pushing them away even if it hurts. I sometimes try to figure out why I do that and I think it’s because I’ve seen so many girls with broken heart that I don’t want to get mine broken to. Or maybe it’s because I’ve lost people that I’m really close to and I’m afraid of that happening, so I just stopped before it gets worst.

The last couple of days Connor was treating me different, he actually was being nice to me and I like that because it reminded me why I thought he was a good person and decided to talk to him. But then he was back at being a jerk to me. The last day of school we played twister and he played with me and other friends. The truth that has been our best time together since our fight in January, we really enjoyed being around each other or at least that’s what I think.

And know we go back to the first time I decided to write in a blog. That I told you guys about how was going my first day of summer. I’ve never written before in a blog so this is all knew to me and as far as my blog been public no one apparently can connect with me or give me any advice. I guess it because all I’ve being doing its telling you about thing that had happen in my life. The truth is that I found this blog a long time ago but haven’t posted anything and I thin k what make me do it was that I just can take my life any more, every time it gets worst and worst.

I got two months to decide what I’m going to do with my life. Yesterday my dad got a called that they were going to promote him in a company he works doing I don’t know what but the thing is that know I need to move to LA. And I’m about to start my senior year and I really wanted to spent it with my friends here in New York, even though I dislike half of my class I wanted to spend prom and graduation with them. But at the same time this is the opportunity I was looking for, to maybe restart again.

I KNOW THIS ONE WAS SHORT BUT I PROMISE THE OTHER ONE ITS GOING TO BE MORE INTERESTING AND LONGER. VOTE & COMMENT.