Looking for an answer.

Chapter 1

 It was first day of vacation and as far as it has gone has it's been the worst. It's been raining all day, I'm not gonna lie i like rainy days, those are the lazy ones. But at the same time are the ones that makes you think about everything and when I mean everything is everything, like what you’ve done, what you want to do, what you should’ve had done, and guilty sometimes.

I decided to take a hot-long shower to relax and it work. When the first drop of hot water hit my skin my mind cleared. I didn’t knew what I was thinking about, I even forgot what day was it. After half an hour in the shower I knew my mom was gonna come soon to say that I was taking too long, so I pull myself up to turn off the shower and all those thoughts I escape while I was on the shower came back faster than saying Hi.

I got two months before school starts again and a year to leave high school and start living the college life( a.k.a. I’m fucked). So in other words I’ve been really stressed out. I got so many problems like: my mom hasn’t been paid for three months, I missed my SAT deadline registration plus I need to start my college’s applications & I really REALLY need a summer job. My junior year was okay I’m definitely not going to forget most of it. It all started in august when I started in a new school with basically NO friends and wasn’t planning on making, I only knew a girl from my last school and we weren’t even that close. Then I had this stupid fights with my old friends that knew me since I was little and now I don’t talk to them anymore. And for some weird reason I’m glad because for a while I felt happy and in a good place without drama. I made some new friends that I truly believe they would be around for a while, but I hope is more than that because with them I feel comfortable, I feel like I know who I really am and I like that, but at the same time sometimes I don’t feel like it. But they always give me support and hear and I like that and I thank them a lot for that.

This year has been really different from the others, knowing that I’m in a new school, I’ve got to know more about myself that I have ever done. I have redeem myself in a way that I’ve tried new things to see if I like it or if it’s part of me and none of it has surprise me because in a way I kind of knew it was in me, I just never showed it I guess. My motto is do what you want without caring what other people think, while you feel happy.