Life, Not As It Used To Be

Chapter 15: Goodbye

The funeral is today and I am not ready for this. It's going to be so hard to be in the front row looking at my parents coffins, having people come up to me telling me how sorry they are. I don't want your pity. Yall made me feel so bad growing up and now you're apologizing for the death of my parents. No, I don't want to hear it.

I put on my black mesh dress, black heels, I then put on the infinity necklace my mom got me. I did a little smokey eye, waterproof mascara and eyeliner. Once I was done with my outfit, I went to get Carter dressed. He wore a suit with his hair spiked up. Dad thought he was more handsome with his hair spiked.

I sat in the rocking chair for a minute with my hands on my stomach. I canceled my appointment, so I still don't know what I am having. "This isn't how it was suppose to go. You are still my baby no matter what you hear me?" I poked my stomach and he/she kicked my hand back.

"Adriana, it's time to go." Chase came into Carter's room.

"Okay. Carter, it's time to go munchkin." I grabbed his hand and he headed downstairs to the car.

There were so many people there. People from their work, family member, neighbors, friends, even strangers. The Thompson's were the first to approach me.

"Dear, I'm sorry you have to go through this. If you need anything you are more than welcome to come over to the house." Cassandra pulled me into a hug.

She knows I am pregnant but I don't know if she knows it is her son's child.

"Your parents were wonderful people. It is a shame what happened to them. Like my wife said, come to the house if you need anything, even if it is 3am." said Anthoney.

"Thank you, I appreciate it." I told them both. They then went to take their seats with Kaelyn.

"I wasn't able to meet your parents, but if they were anything like you they shouldn't have passed." said Josh.

"Oh no, they weren't like me. They were trying to make up for lost time though." I told him.

"Well, I am sorry to hear that." He turned to Sawyer.

"I know you don't want to hear me say sorry. I didn't like hearing sorry when Josh went missing, so I won't say it, but that doesn't mean I'm not thinking about you." Is all he said before he turned to sit down. Josh followed him. I watched them for minute. Josh punched him in the arm. "What?" I could read Sawyer's lips. Josh didn't say anything, he just turned and faced the front.

"Come on, let's go sit down." Kayla grabbed my hand and we walked toward the front pew. I sat down and closed my eyes.

"I can do this. I can do this. I can do this." I kept repeating to myself through the full service. When everyone walked up there to say their last goodbyes, I sat still. "I can't do this." I just started balling my eyes out.

"Uh-oh," said Carter. I just grabbed him and wrapped my arms around him with one hand on my belly. I have already lost my parent, I don't want to lose Carter and the baby too. Please dear Lord, don't take them from me too.

After a few minutes, I was finally ready to say my goodbyes. I walked up there with Carter. "Yall weren't there when I had my first crush or when I needed help with homework. Then you had Carter and threw him on me like he was my responsibility. I understand there is work but your kids are more important. I think you realized that and tried to make up for all the time the lost. But some dumb words-I-can-not-use person had to ruin that for all of us. He killed yall and no telling what he will do next. Don't worry though. I have some pretty awesome friends to keep me safe. Oh and I plan on going next week to find out what the baby is. I will always love yall. And I will definitely miss yall. I will take good care of Carter, don't you worry. Bye Mom. Bye Dad."

I turned and walked out of the funeral home. We went to the burial and that was hard too. I was just glad to be heading home.

Sam took Carter up for a nap, Kayla was making some lunch, and Chase was calling his mom to let her know they were staying at my house again. I walked into my parents room and sat on the bed. I glanced down and saw an envelope on the floor under the bed. I reached down a picked it up. It was addressed to my father. It has already been opened. Curiosity was getting to me so I opened it and read the letter.

"Dear Robert,

I know this is late but she has been asking about you more than ever. You have a daughter. Her name is Olivia Rose. She will be eleven June 27th. I don't know what to do, she wants to meet you. I know you have a family of your own and we said we weren't going to bring this up but I can't just leave her clueless. I sent a photo with this letter so you can see her. Please just think about seeing her.

Sincerely Katherine."

"Oh my gosh! I have a sister!" I grabbed the picture out of the envelope and looked at it. "Oh my gosh! She looks identical to me but with black hair and blue eyes! This can't be happening can it?" I grabbed the letter and put it back in the envelope. I made my way downstairs and found Sam, Kayla, and Chase. "Guys, I gotta a question. Does this look like me?" I held the picture up to my face.

"Yeah." They all said.

"Who is that?" Sam asked.

"This," I shock the picture. "This is my sister!"

"What? No let me see that again." Chase grabbed the picture out of my hands and looked at it closely then at me. "Oh wow. She is!"

"I told you! I have to go find her! They could be in danger too. Can yall watch Carter for me? I will only be a few day at the most."

"Yeah of course." Kayla said.

I went upstairs and packed my bags. The envelope said New York. I guess I am going to New York!