Impractical Jokers, Practically

Chapter Seven

What just happened? 

Well, obviously something happened. Because Sal was so happy to wake up with me this morning. In his bed, I might add, and now he's pissed that I can't remember all the details from last night. I'm standing in Sal's bedroom, without Sal, literally dumbfounded. My mind is racing as I'm trying to go over what I know: The boys and I went out to the bar last night. I saw Sal talking to some girl. A boy, Noah, came up and talked to me.  When I, and for some reason Sal, said no to dancing with Noah, that's when Sal told me that he doesn't think of himself as my brother. Then, blank. Everything's blank from that moment until waking up with Sal in his bed. Me being confused, him getting angry, then him leaving. Okay, that's all I know. So what happened within that blank? 

I start pacing back and forth across the room. I need to figure this out. I need to try to remember. Because I can't stand to see Sal this upset. I need to know why he was so happy. And why he was so sad when I wasn't. 

Think Alexa. Think. Why was he so happy? Why was he so devastated when I couldn't match his excitement? Did something happen between us...? 

I gasp. Almost instantly, my mind is flooded with scenes from the bar. I remember. I remember everything: 

"Please. Don't say that I'm like a brother to you because I'm not. I'm not your brother." Sal's eyes are staring at me deeply. Intensely. He's willing me to say something, anything, but I remain silent. I'm afraid to say anything. Too confused and dumbfounded. And I didn't want to say the wrong thing. 

"You don't actually believe that I'm like your brother do you?" He scoffs. "Because I absolutely don't think of you as my sister." He makes the words brother and sister sound like dirty words, the way he's says them. 

"I--I only said that to dismiss him. I wasn't--wasn't really thinking. I just wanted Noah to go away." I try to explain. 

Sal looks at me for a moment and then goes, "Uh, you think that by telling him you're available is going to leave you alone? Are you serious? You should have just said that yeah, one of us you walked in with was your boyfriend.  He might have then walked away! Instead, you--you said that you're available for this stranger! That we're your brothers. That--that I'm your brother." He whispers that last part. 

"Sal, no. I mean, I realize what you're saying and yeah, you have a point. But I don't actually think of you guys as my brothers. I was only telling him short answers so that he can get the hint and would leave. I said no to dancing with him remember?"

"We said no to dancing. I wasn't going to let you dance with him." He sighs, "Well I'm glad you were trying to make him leave alone. So, you don't actually think of us as your brothers?"

"No, of course not. I mean, not really. Maybe only Joe and Q." I think about it for a moment and go, "Yeah, I guess Joe and Q feel like brothers to me. Not so much Murr though. Murr is my best friend, not my brother." 

Sal looks a little hurt. "But do you, uh, do you like Murray? If he's not like a brother to you, then maybe it's because you have feelings for him." He cringes, waiting for my answer. 

"I do like him, but not in that way. We're best friends. That's it. Why do you ask?"

"Surely if you jump out of a plane with him, to stop him from panicking, he must mean something to you." Sal says sheepishly. 

I smile and say, "Well, he does mean a great deal to me. But only as my friend. I would do the same thing for you, you know." 

With that, Sal smiles from ear to ear. It's like I made his day. He asks, "So, you don't think of me as your brother then?"