Jodha's Diary

Jodha's Diary : Part 4

Dear Diary,

I don't know what to say about the turn my life has taken.
Everything is just so messed up. Being a princess is definitely not a boon for
me, always a bane only. Lets begin from the starting.

As you already know, my younger sis, Sukanya has a huge
crush on Suryabhan Singh, the prince of Bhangarh. I was so happy that she has
finally got her prince charming. One, she always wanted. But then, My fate
can't see me happy for long, I suppose. I came to know from Maasa that my
marriage has been fixed. Now you'll think whats there to be sad about? Right?
There is too much to be sad about. I was like its too hasty, isn't it? But she
said that they have chosen the prince after a lot of thought. And, I would like
him for he is brave and good - looking at the same time. I was fine with the
proposal until I heard his name. It was Suryabhan Singh.

Once Maasa said his name, I heard nothing further. She kept
on speaking and I was busy in my own thoughts. I thought only and only about
Sukanya then. How would she feel, how would she react when she got to know
this. Ufff...these thoughts were killing me. As soon as Maasa left, I realized
what to do next. Only one person could help me out, and that was Baapusa. I
decided to talk to him.

I tried my best to make him realize that she was my sister
and I could not do this to her. But his argument was, that I'm the princess of
Amer first, and I have to do whatever is best for its people. Bhangarh was a
strong kingdom and this alliance would benefit Amer a lot. I said to him there
was no difference if Sukanya marries him. Then, another surprise came. He said
that it was the prince who had brought this proposal, and he wanted to marry me
only. Now why the hell is this prince so interested in me? I fail to
understand. He said that they would not accept Sukanya and this alliance would
break. I had no other option, but to leave.

I was simply pacing to and fro in my room, thinking of what
to do next, when I got an idea. I could talk directly to Suryabhan Singh about
all this. There would be no problem if he himself denies the proposal. Yup, that's
what I should do, I thought. He was staying here in the palace only, for the gangaur
celebrations. I somehow sent him an invitation to meet me on the terrace. And,
I made sure nobody knew this.

I stood behing the jharokha and he came and stood to the
opposite side. Without paying much attention to him, I began with my story. I
told him that I couldn't marry him as my sister liked him a lot and wished to
marry him. I couldn't give such a
heartbreak to my little sis. He kept on listening in rapt attention, without a
word. I told him that I wanted him to deny the proposal to this marriage as I
couldn't. He stiil was quiet. After he while he looked up and spoke out his
thoughts. He said that he was in love with me, from the first day he saw me,
and would never deny this proposal. That was the shock of my life. He loved me!
Oh my God...Someone loves me so much and I don't even know that...Isn't that
crazy? He told me not to consider this as a political marriage as this was not
one. He wanted to marry me only because he loved me. He also said that my
sister would feel soo bad if she had to marry a person who loves someone else...How
would she feel if she came to know this after her marriage? Will she be happy?...He
asked me. His points were valid. But then also, it was me who had come in
between Sukanya's dreams. And I felt very bad about that. I looked up at him,
and he smiled back at me. That's cute! I thought. But, I had many other things
to think about. I turned back to move to my room, and got another big shock.
There was Sukanya , staring me in shock or disbelief or whatever. She ran to
her room and I followed her.