One year older , one year bolder

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I wake up this morning to the beautiful face of my soon to be husband . I stared at his face for a long minute feeling lucky to have him by my side . I can't believe that it's been almost two years that we met . I owe my gentelman to the school's door . It's a sunny day , april is always fantastic in Manhattan . As i opened the curtains wearing nothing but Joe's black shirt , the sun gave my legs a warm covering . I went to the balcony where my favourite chair  is ,swinging my feet on the other . From up here you know how small you are facing the world .

Lost like always in the novel i am holding , i missed the arrival of Joe untill he kissed my cheek . He was holding two cups of coffee , there was something special about that coffee . It represented him , sweet , hot and addictive . We relaxed talking about the wedding preparatifs . It was only in one week , but aside from the dress and the cake , we gave our parents the previlege of doing it all . We are both lazy and the wedding will be done in ten years if it was up to us to do it . We want to get married soon but it's our mothers who wanted to celebrate their children wedding in a propre way . I appriciated all the effort they put in our education untill we remain like this . Mothers are the root of all good in life .
I went home in the evening after spending another great day with Joe , days like these are why i wanted to spend my whole life with him . Around him it just makes sence , it's like the world drops all the rules about time and space , with him love is the only rule that has ever existed .

In my room , i took a glance at all my photos , it's weird how at one point of your life , you have to leave behind a lot of things and move on in order to find others . I made a step into my dressing , now that it was empty , only a few boxes were there . I was staring , when a voice called me . A voice from the heart . I can feel her , it's like she is dancing around my room like the old days . Maybe , she wanted me to be reminded that she used to be a big part of the life in this room . Her spirit was taking looks at our photos too . She came to say goodbye , maybe after all , this is the right time to say it, to send her free to the sky . Perhaps the two last letters ought to be opened before the wedding . She wanted to free her soul and mine . Between all her calls , this one was certain . " Set us free , let us complete our different yet similar roads ." She was saying that while i was smiling pulling the black box out one last time .

It doesn't matter how ready you are , when you hold things like this between your hands , it's like putting yourself in a buble of memories . It dips your heart in a warm yet sad feeling . I took a seat on the hard ground , under my favourite tree in the backyard , maybe i was giving my goodbyes to the house too . I pulled the letter from the back pocket of my ripped favourite jeans , and wearing Mia's white shirt . I opened the pink paper ,ready to embrace strong emotions .

Dear Pie ,

Why won't you visit ? You know i miss you too , and you know nobody will come took a glance at my cold grave other than Mom and the poor lady must be working .

Who tooks care of you ? Who makes you laugh ? Who else makes your tears dry ?

I shall love him . You know i would if i could .

Come visit me please , come soon . Or you know what , come now !!

And never forget the mantra .

The Love for the soul .

The Lust for the life .

The crazyness , to make it a fun ride .

Hey B , move your ass , one of us is laying here waiting .

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I find my self laughing out loud on my way to the car . As much as it was sad , she found a way to make me smile like always . I was heading to the cemetry , it felt like the road i used to take every sunday to her house .

In a few minutes , I was in front of her grave "full of life " , they wrote on it . I was just thinking how true this thing was . I took a seat on the wet grass besides her , putting some yellow tulipes , her favourite flowers on the grave . Tears were a Fountain that was streaming down my face , somehow i felt her pleasent presence around . I had the urge to hug her and knowing that i couldn't made me sick . At least i can talk to her right now . I made myself comfortable and smiled .
" i have missed you girl 😢 it will never be the same without you , and as cliché as it sound , it stills true . You know that i need you now more than ever . I am getting married to Joe . Yes , the guy whom i met at the first day of school . Mia , he makes me feel secure , with him i can get over the sadness , i can be my true self and i can talk openly about what i really like . I wish you were my witness because step by step you witnessed my life and it big moments , this is a one of those moments Mia . It's been hard over here but i know you are proud of me because this time i let Serena out of her package full of  low confidence .Watch over my wedding my dear . I can feel you presence because my heart is always letting you out . Rest on peace M. I love you ."

As i was making my way to the car , my phone was ringing it was Lilly , i answered right the way since it must be a thing about the wedding . She was helping my mother through every step just like the good friend she is , i couldn't be more gratefull .
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The days passed like a bite of choclate , sweet and fast . Tomorrow , i'll wake up as a bride .

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