Love, lust and crazy

The goodbye

I woke up a bit tired and dizzy this morning , the stress get always the best of nights like these . Opening the curtains , the burning sun of the first day of May hugged me entirely through my big glass window cause i was wearing nothing but my small white dress . This sensation took me back to my childhood summer vacations and i felt suddenly old . I'm missing the old days for sure , but i find myself happy and gratefull of what i had turned to be .

Today is my wedding day . It's the day i'll be walking down the isle . I have never thought that my marriage will be this soon . Not like most of brides , i didn't feel the doubt about this next step of my life . I felt covered with serenity and belief . I believe that my happy days are looking at me from a breath taking , 15th century balcony calling me out loud to join them .

A brief knock on my already slightly opened door was followed by my mother entrance . She was holding a vanilla cake , my favourite .

" I got you vanilla cake Serena ."

" Thank you mom , but vanilla cake is birthday special ."

" I won't be able to wake you up the day of your birthday from now on , so i thought we will be needing the last birthday special right on time . "

" I told you , i am not going to cry on my wedding day . Why are you already making it impossible . " I said crying .

" OH, Serena we said that it's just the last cake on time , but you will always get your specials . "

She hugged me for a long time repeating how much she loves me . I wanted to stay in her arms for a long while , it was the most safe place on earth. Away of all the wars and the daily fears ,family always make you feel secure under their wings .

Anyway, the hair dresser was on her way to our house and i had to clean myself before her arrival . My father prepared a warm bath for me , i was in an awe when i stepped in , it smelled vanilla . I know that i have a weired sort of vanilla's addiction , but don't judje the bride .

As i made my way to the big living room wall's miror after spending three hours on turning me into a proper bride . I was finally able to see myself . The dress that i chose along with mom and Lilly was stuning , it was perfectly the dress for me , a princess like dress with a silvery small belt . My hair was in a low chignon living my braids free and curly at the ends , with a light make up and a matte red lipstick , i was simply beautifull . Mom and Dad stood behind me and oscar in front of me with my hands on his shoulders , we made the perfect picture that will forever be one of my absolute favourites .

The only problem i had is that i will be skipping lunch time and everybody in the house was making fun of me instead of making me a sandwitch . We spent the next hour taking pictures . I only had two bride's maids : Lilly and Carla my dear cousin . The third spot was for Mia , and since she was not there , her place will remain empty . Lilly and Carla looked really hot . Sam was complimenting his girlfriend all the time . The mini baby blue dresses i got them were matching their blond hair in a wonderfull way . They looked almost like a pair of twins .

within the next hour , we were already in front of the church back door . I was supposed to make my entrance in ten minutes . It was the longest time i had to wait and it's like my brain turned to be a magnet , because i was getting nothing across my mind but sadly and silly ideas . The main one was me turning ugly at the last minute and Joe running away , imagining it in a slow motion was really making me smile nervously . I was again inside my own bubble , when my father took me by the hand and smiled , i knew it wasthe high time since i heard nothing but low music . My father whispers in my ear when the door opened :" You still have a home here at new york darling ." His words gave me shivers all over my body , " I know dad , I love you ."

I turned my head as we made our first step to face the big hall and when our eyes met , it's like the church was empty , it's more like there was no church at all . We were in the woods , naked in front of eachother , but can't spot anything but our eyes . The depth of my love for him was in sudden bigger than the whole planet , something that makes you drunk and sober at once . An alien feeling . I knew I was marrying the right person . For all my life , this remains my favourite moment of realisation . A sweet one .

He looked at me and his lips formed a small "o" shape , then he pressed them into the " I won " smile . I grined at him , and sticked my tongue out . He smiled his all-american-boy smile , and he screamed across the isle "Nice dress Roberts ." I screamed back " you are not bad yourself Roberts " . Everybody was laughing at our spontanious moment , even Mia's free soul was there happy and proud .